Thursday, November 18, 2004

Dear old friend,

      I'm just writing you a note to tell you that I'm done with regrets tonight. When I hung up the phone, after you told me that you were getting married again, I thought, it's never going to happen now. We're not going to be together.
      For a moment, I cursed the bad timing that has always plagued us. For a moment, I thought of the crazy loving we weren't going to share. For a moment, I thought of laughter in a shared, cozy dark. For a moment, I thought, well, my heart will break. And I braced myself for the shock.
      But my heart kept right on beating. And then I realized it was okay. I had been in love with you so long, had become so accustomed to it that I hadn't even noticed that it was only habit now. Somewhere over the years, the passion had been replaced with friendship.
      I thought about it all day today. I turned it over in my mind, examining this strong, healthy reaction that I hadn't expected to find. Somehow, some way, some time when I wasn't looking, I grew up. And it feels fine.
      So I'm done with regrets tonight. There's a whole world still out there. I've wasted too much time already. A part of me will always love you, but it doesn't love you any more. I hope you finally find happiness. You deserve it. And so do I.
Your friend,
TECH

6 comments:

Trixie said...

Oh there you go, being all mature-like and everything. Good for you, and thanks for setting a good example. I'm just glad you didn't write about love being like a butterfly -- if you let it go... blah blah blah.... you know the line I'm talking about. Sometimes I just wanna squash that butterfly like a bug. But I'm glad your heart is big enough to overcome a love that was just a habit.

Michelle said...

Hmm Bittersweet isn't it? All the best to you on your new beginning within.

Unknown said...

Ack! Since I didn't know you liked any special, talk about a curve ball.

CrystalDiggory said...

Finally! You really do deserve so much more than just a habit.

night-rider said...

Oh Tech! Do make that trip, come over and teach me how to reach this space. You'd be very welcome to visit and you'd get lots of lovely photos.

Anonymous said...

That does sound mature! Are you sure youre feeling okay? :)
-Susan1