Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Maybe harsh

I keep thinking writer's block is just another name for laziness. I know that's harsh, but it seems I know so many people who want to write a book, scribble a few lines, talk about the book unceasingly, but when it comes to actually putting words on paper, they never do it. Writing a book is work. Hard work. And would-bes don't like applying their butts to the chair and their fingers to the keyboard. Especially when there's so many other exciting things to do in the world. They can take writing courses and talk in chat on writers' sites and blog and generally do anything other than actually write. Which is okay if it makes them happy, but it sure doesn't get a book written.

Or maybe what I perceive as laziness is actually the result of a block. Maybe they have a fear of success. Some people do. Or perhaps their vision of the book in their mind is so clear that, when they have to use lowly words to tell about it, they can't handle the difference between their clear shining vision and how their words portray it. I know I've felt that way. Action that seemed to vigorous in my mind often just lies there on the paper. Of course, that's what rewriting is for.

I do know that, for me, writing courses, chatting on writers' sites, etc., doesn't get anything done, however much I may enjoy them. I don't know any other way to write other than to actually write. It's a dogged, determined pursuit. I don't know any other way to write than to simply write. It's like all things: easier in the telling than in the doing.

And why am I thinking that? Well, today at work, someone dropped by and saw my display about my books and proceeded to tell me she would love to write a book, she had a great idea, and she'd let me write it if I wanted to.

She said, "The idea is the thing, I know."

I told her that I had too many books started and would have to pass.

She said, "Oh, you'll hate yourself when I find someone to write it. It's a best seller."

And maybe I will.

But I doubt it.

Have a great night. Talk to you later.

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Sunday, March 29, 2009

Progress

Three or four more hours on 75 Dates for $25 or Less! and it will be finished, barring unforeseen difficulties. That's what I've worked on all evening, and thus that's all I have to say!

I hope you have a great week. Talk to you soon.

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Saturday, March 28, 2009

Excerpt from "Debt Free At Last!"

I thought I'd share a bit from the book Kelley Benson and I are working on. Tell me what you think.

Excerpt from Debt Free At Last! 50 Ways to Win Your Financial Freedom

Do you have a saving account? If not, why not? We don’t think there’s any good reason not to have one. You can start one with as little as $20. This is a priority. You must have a saving account as soon as possible.

And you must start saving some money immediately. It doesn’t matter that you’re not socking away hundreds of dollars. It only matters that you have a savings plan that you can handle and control.

You might notice we didn’t say anything about looking at interest rates on a savings account. Do look around for the best rate you can find, but the sad truth is savings accounts rarely pay as much interest as what inflation is taking from you. That doesn’t matter. You want your savings account for other reasons; making money is not its primary purpose.

Its primary purpose is to protect you and your family from financial emergencies. Before you invest in CDs or any other financial products, you should have an emergency fund first. We recommend at least three months salary; more is better, but get some money put away as soon as you can.

What is the emergency fund for? It’s not to buy clothes or birthday presents or designer purses. It’s for real emergencies. Here’s a list of emergencies and non-emergencies:

Paying the deductible on your car insurance so you can get your car repaired after an accident – Emergency.
Getting a tattoo – Non-emergency.
Paying your bills after you’ve been laid off – Emergency.
Buying a new flat screen TV – Non-emergency.
Paying unexpected medical expenses – Emergency.
Repairing your car so you can get to work or job search – Emergency.
Purchasing the latest video game – Non-emergency.
Repairing your home heater after it quits working – Emergency.
Taking a vacation – Non-emergency.
Replacing your prescription eyeglasses – Emergency.
Buying designer frames for your eyeglasses – Non-emergency.

You could possibly turn some of those emergencies into non-emergencies if you’re able to work out payment plans and can tap other resources. For instance, some car body shops will waive your deductible or let you pay that amount out since they’re getting the majority from your insurance company. And medical providers usually have some type of payment plan. Investigate your options before depleting your fund. You don’t want to tap your emergency fund unless you have to. It’s there behind you, protecting you and your family from the insecurities of life. If you protect it, it will protect you.

The second purpose of a savings account is to get you used to the idea of saving money. Many people do not have this habit. Money burns a hole in their lives. They have nothing and will never have anything – unless they win the lottery -- because they save nothing. (And if that millions-to-one chance happens and they do win the lottery, you can be assured they will be broke again soon enough.)

You’re not one of those people. You understand the importance of the habit of savings. You take care of your home, car, and your relationships because you want them all to last as long as possible. You’re smart, aren’t you?

The third – and perhaps most important – purpose of an emergency fund is to give you and your family a sense of security. In this insecure world in which stock markets crash and jobs are here this morning and gone this afternoon, you are planning for the future. You are going to see to it – to the best of your ability – that you and your family don’t have to do without clothing, food, or shelter. You’re who stands between them and the problems of financial ruin. They are fortunate they have you because you’re going to take care of them.

Remember this: it doesn’t matter how much you save at the beginning as long as you save some. Five or 10 dollars a week is fine if that’s what you can manage. As long as you consistently save money, you will soon see your savings increase. And that little bit of interest you receive is the cherry on top.

Look at your budget. (We just made one, remember?) See how much you can put into an emergency fund savings account this month, this week, now. Is it more important to have all those premium channels on your TV or to secure you and your family’s financial future? It’s an easy decision to make when you take the long view. And you’re a smart person so the long view is easy for you.

Start a savings account now. Someday – maybe sooner than we hope - you and your family will be glad you did.

Copyright 2009 by Stephen B. Bagley & Kelley Benson. All rights reserved.

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Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Excerpt & other things

Excerpt from Dragons In Flight

     I was well on my way to a serious drunk in the Tavern of the Silver Stag when Manjarous finally found me. He walked over to me. I kicked the nearest bench back.
     "Sit down," I drawled. "Have a couple. On me. You can catch up."
     He shook his head and remained standing. "You can drown in regret if you're not careful," Manjarous said. He looked at me steadily. "Don't do it, Stefan. Don't waste your life like this."
     "How should I waste it?" I mocked him.
     "You would have saved her if you had been able," he said softly. "It's not your fault Maladora passed on."
     "Murdered," I said. "She didn't pass away. She didn't die in her bed. She didn't close her eyes and peacefully go beyond. She was murdered. She died in pain. She died wanting me ... to save her." For a moment, I felt her shuddering body again in my arms and I heard my voice pleading with her to stay with me. I would have worshiped any god who had saved her, but the gods are deaf. And cruel. They gave me magic at the same time they took away my love.
     "You couldn't save her," Manjarous said.
     "I could have sent her away," I said. "If I hadn't loved her so much ..." I fought for control of my voice. "I should have sent her away. She would be alive if I had."
     "Stefan, you don't know that," he said. "Gal'karn would not have given --"
     I waved off his words. "It's my fault." I raised my mug and drained the remaining ale. "I'm going to get drunk now. Either join me or leave me alone." I held up the mug so that the barmaid would see I needed a refill.
     Manjarous frowned and shook his head. "Stubborn fool." He sighed. "Try to get back before dawn. Even you need sleep." He walked away and left me with my regrets.

-- Excerpt from Dragons In Flight, Copyright 2009 Stephen B. Bagley

***
Dragons In Flight is the sequel to Dragons Gather. Yeah, I know it's weird to be jotting down notes and scenes for the sequel to an unfinished book, but I'd rather get that information down where I can find it later.
***
A long day at work. Having a lot of trouble with my stomach. I think I'm reacting to the Plaquenil. Going to talk to the doctor about it. Maybe reduce the dose or find something else.
***
I'm going to be off work tomorrow afternoon and Friday. Taking some "me" time. I'm going to work on finishing 75 Dates for $25 or Less! I'm ready to have it finished. I need to add another -- Lord help me -- thousand words to it for it to be length we need. Gail has done the majority of the work on the book so it's only fair that I finish it up. We have big plans for the book, but we can't start them until we get it finished. And that's what I'm working on.
***
Have you stopped by the new Murder by the Acre site? I'm quite proud how it turned out. I'm going to add a few more items, but it's worth looking at, particularly if you haven't read the book yet. I have the complete first chapter there for folks to read. Go here and see what you think.
***
I've been watching UFO Hunters lately. Although I don't believe UFOs exist -- not the sense that aliens are among us -- I still find it fascinating. I wonder what the truth really is and why so many people say they've seen aliens or UFOs. Why don't I believe in UFOs? Because stellar distances are simply too vast, and physics is simply too unforgiving. I wish hyperspace, warp drive, etc., could exist, but such things are simply not possible. I hope I'm wrong, but I suspect I'm not.
***
Going to call it a night now. Hope the night is good to you and that tomorrow is even better. Talk to you soon!

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Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Help! Chivalry has fallen and it can't get up ...

I intended to post something tonight. Something pithy and funny. Instead I find myself barely able to stay awake. So talk among yourselves. I'll be back tomorrow. But to keep you entertained, here's a look at chivalry:

Before I go on another date, I want to know the answer to a important question that can mean the difference between a good relationship and one that shows up on Jerry Springer: Am I expected to open doors for her or not? You wouldn't think that would be much of a mystery. You'd be wrong.

Let me explain by first taking a brief look at chivalry. Many people think chivalry is dead. Many people also watch reality television. You can't trust many people.

Anyway, chivalry started in the days of the knights. It was easy to be chivalrous then. The ladies were dressed in heavy, billowing gowns, and the men were dressed in heavy, shiny armor. Since it typically took both men and women two hours to get dressed, neither sex was all that excited about taking anything off. Not to mention that the weight of their clothes and armor tended to put a strain on the back and thus the ardor. So ladies and knights went around sighing with unspoken love and swooning with passion or sometimes sunstroke.

Ever so often, a lady would give her knight an article of her clothing -- usually a perfumed handkerchief. The knight would then place it in his gauntlet and sniff it now and then. (This was, of course, before the invention of hair-spray and glue, two products that would sweep the sniffing market by storm in the 15th century.)

He sniffed for two reasons: one, to remind him of his lady-love, and two, they didn't have deodorant then. After a hard day knighting in that hot armor, a knight smelled pretty rank. (Their odor explains why some knights could kill several men with one blow. The knights had to lift their arms to swing their swords. With a good wind behind them, they could wipe out armies.)

All that sighing, swooning, knighting and sniffing left little time for loving. As a result, the knights and their ladies died out. Fortunately, enough commoners and serfs existed to keep humanity going.

As you can tell, chivalry was easy then. All the ladies had to do was be beautiful and lay in a large supply of handkerchiefs, and all the men had to do was kill a few dragons and bully some serfs. What could be simpler?

Times have changed since then. For one thing, it's practically impossible to find a serf, even for Republicans. For another, women have struggled to win an equal place in society, and some of them feel that chivalry is just a way to keep women downtrodden.

A couple of weeks back, I took a woman to dinner. At the restaurant, I jumped out of my car and went over to her side to open the door. She reached for her purse and opened her door at the same time. The door struck me directly on my knees, pinning me against the truck parked beside us.

Still not looking up, she decided the door was caught on something (she thought it might have been her seatbelt, she told me later) and pushed harder. I would have yelled but couldn't draw in enough air to breathe. She even closed the door and opened it a couple more times, baffled by its refusal to swing wide. Less you think I was enjoying becoming a decal on the truck, I must explain that I couldn't walk and would have fallen except for the truck's mirror, which luckily was buried in my kidneys and holding me up.

She finally got out of the car and asked, "What were you doing?"

"I was opening the door for you," I said through teeth gritted with pain.

"Why?" she asked.

"It's how a man shows a woman he's dating that he respects her," I said.

"It sounds like you think women are weaklings that need to be taken care of and kept in the kitchen," she said. "I can open my own doors, thank you very much, and I can make my way in the world without a man to guide me!"

"So does that mean that you want to pick up the check or should we just share it?" I asked.

"Does that mean you don’t want to kiss me goodnight?" she snapped.

We'll close the curtain on that date other than to mention that she really knew how to fight and I was lucky to get away with most of my hair. Anyway, my point -- at least I think it was my point -- is that chivalry isn't dead; it just has fallen and can't get up.

Copyright 2009 Stephen B. Bagley. All rights reserved.

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Monday, March 23, 2009

This and that

Murder by the Acre now has its own website. There you can read the complete first chapter of the book. I've been intending to make one for it for some time, but hadn't done so. Murder by Dewey Decimal also has its own site; I haven't posted its first chapter yet, but I will over the next few days. Here are the sites: Murder by the Acre and Murder by Dewey Decimal.

I haven't felt well all day. Not sure exactly what's going on. Maybe spring fever ... except I didn't think it actually meant you had a fever! I spent most of the evening working on 75 Dates for $25 or Less!, the dating tip book by Gail Claunts and myself. The book will also include one free date in each of the fifty states as a bonus as well as 15 Frugal Dating Tips.

And my other co-author, Kelley Benson, brought by some material for our book Debt Free At Last! 50 Ways to Win Financial Freedom. I'll be devoting more and more time to that book as the 75for25 book gets nearer to completion. I'd like for both to come out in early summer.

Anyway, it's late, and I need to be in bed. I hope things are going well for you. Talk to you tomorrow.

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Friday, March 20, 2009

Battlestar Earth

Watched the finale of Battlestar Galactica tonight. Kinda disappointing, actually. They left many questions unanswered and basically used a vague mysticism to explain other questions, but it wasn’t terrible and had many good moments. And if I’m disappointed in some of the answers they provided, it was, after all, their story, and they could end as they choose.

As I considered their choices for the ending, I thought about how popular writing is a walk between what your reading public wants and what you want for the story. It’s good when both of those coincide. It’s good when a writer wants to please his/her audience. I have actually thrown books across the room when the writers, trying to be clever or perhaps even disliking the reader, writing an ending that had no basis. I see this a lot in so-called dark fantasy, where – after a great adventure – the whole cast dies or ends up miserable and broken.

I’ve never liked unhappy endings. I’ve seen enough senseless misery and pointless tragedy in real life that I have no interest in reading about it. I don’t require totally happy endings, but I want hopeful ones. I want the hero’s sacrifice to mean something. Once an author has burned me with a pointless story -– or one in which the message is that life is pointless and meaningless –- I won’t read them again. Won’t buy their books and will recommend other people not buy them. They wasted my money.

Of course, I know a lot of writers out there are young so they could possibly be forgiven for liking darkness. After all, they think they’re being shocking and mature. They have no idea that a million, better writers have already walked the avenues of despair. I guess each generation has to drink from that bitter cup themselves. But what a waste of time.

We humans are like that. We read history, say we know history, but go out and make the same cruel, bloody mistakes. One of the themes of Battlestar Galactica was: “This has happened before. It will happen again.” Although in the last episode, the writers gave us a bit of hope -- that maybe a complex system, repeated enough times, could eventually learn and choose something different. Wouldn’t that be wonderful? Could we choose to grow beyond what we are now?

I don't know, but I hope so. I hope so.


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Thursday, March 19, 2009

A good night

Had a good night last night despite Mikey having to go to his dad's. He likes being with us, but he has his brothers to play with at his dad's and he likes that. Next time he comes down, I hope to be able to get off work so that I can spend more time with him.

And last night, the Black Dog finally lifted somewhat. I didn't do much -- played World of Warcraft, worked on the 75 Dates book and the family newsletter, and did some laundry -- but it all felt productive, and I slept better. So maybe this black bout is over, and my mental outlook will improve. Hope so.

I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday about "value given." One of the most important things I attempt in my writing is to give the reader their money's worth. I want them to feel that the money they spent on my books was well-spent. That's important to me, particularly during this downturn in the national economy and my personal downturn. I don't want to waste anyone's money if I can help it. And I don't want anyone to waste mine. That's not too much to ask of any author. Or a government for that matter.

It's raining here today, thank the good Lord. We need several inches of rain. Of course, I'd rather we didn't it all in one day. Picky, ain't I? We did the flood thing back in June of 2007 here. We'd rather not do it again.

And now I'll close and let y'all -- all two of you -- read this. Talk to you later. I may even come by your house. So y'all put on clothes!

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Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Black Dog

Truthfully I don’t know why I share my constant battle with the Black Dog. It’s a forever war with me, and while there are times it helps to sit at a table and share war stories with other combatants, ultimately each of us have to go it alone, and that’s all there is to it.

Not that news of other people’s victories isn’t helpful, and sometimes the advice works: “Talking about it with the doctor helps.” “Prayer is my lifeline.” “I couldn’t make it without my meds.” “I sweat the depression out with cardio.” All of that is good advice, and it helps. But there are those other times when words aren’t enough, Heaven is empty, the meds taste like poison to your self-esteem and respect, and you can’t outrun the Black Dog who lopes alongside you, its ember eyes focused on its prey. In those times your victories are all hollow and your defeats always crushing, and how you get out of bed in the morning is a tribute to sheer stubbornness.

Don’t know what to tell you about that, other than to mutter inanely something about how nothing lasts forever, not even the Black Dog, and eventually if you hang on, it will find other easier prey for a time. That’s what I do. Just survive until it lifts, take a deep breath of the morning air, and give thanks for the ceasefire.

I try to stay busy. Fill my mind up with other things. Ignore the dark beast in the corner with its gaping mouth. Listen to upbeat music. Watch funny movies. Read books that end happily. Write, write, write, my personal ritual against the unrelenting bleakness.

Black Dog. That’s what Winston Churchill called it. But long before I had ever heard of Churchill, I knew what it was. I knew what it looked like from the time I was ten. A large beast, skin like the void between stars, gaping jaws to catch the scent of its prey, large paws to carry it swiftly across the plains of my soul, a howl that could tear the heart out of the sky. When I was older, I knew its name was Ananias.

When I was a teenager, Ananias was even my friend. See, I experienced the Black Dog because I was so creative, it was a sign of genius, it was the burden that I bore with some pride because it made me special. All lies, of course, but I didn’t know better. It wasn’t until I got into college and got some counseling that I finally learned the truth: Ananias wasn’t my friend. It wasn’t a mark of honor. All it ever wanted to do was to kill me, and what’s more, it was just a metaphor for my damaged self-esteem, for my broken faith, for the damning self-judgment that I had called down upon myself. That, ultimately, it was just a disease. A chemical imbalance in my brain. No great monster, no gaping fury. Just me battling depression like so many before me and so many behind me.

There is comfort in that. When it stops being special, when you finally realize that other people’s battles –- while not your particular battle –- are still the same, when you can give up the burden of attempting to redeem your life, well, then you can heal. It’s not so dramatic anymore. You talk to doctors, you pray, you take your meds, you exercise, you get better, you heal.

Of course, you’re never cured. But you get better. You learn the situations to avoid, and the people to avoid. You try to stay away from people who feed the bleakness with their negativity. You don’t listen to the nuts who tell you that you just need to pray, give money to, or serve their particular gods and all will be fine. You learn to stop blaming yourself for being different because no one really knows what causes clinical depression. It’s not your fault. Don’t be so full of yourself.

You survive. And I survive. And it’s a good life for all its problems. It’s what we have, and it’s real. We do our best. I can live with it. It's not like we have a choice.

But listen, there are times late at night when in my mind’s eye I can see a darkening horizon and in the gathering silence a lone beast waits.

Waits for me.


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Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Plans and other things

Murder by the Acre is finally available on Barnes and Noble.com. (Click here to buy!) I don't know why it took so long to show up, nearly three months after it went on sale at Amazon.com and Lulu.com. Anyway, it's there for you B&N aficionados.

My next book is 75 Dates for $25 or Less! coming out this May, I hope, on Lulu.com and in June on Amazon and whenever on B&N. Co-authored with my friend Gail Claunts, this book gives some great ideas for inexpensive dates. Romance doesn't have to depend on cash ... Hey, get your minds out of the gutter.

After that, I'll have another co-authored book coming out this summer. This one, tentatively titled Debt Free At Last: 50 Ways to Win Financial Freedom, is co-authored with my friend Kelley Benson. Kelley teaches finance classes at various churches, clubs, colleges, and other civic groups, and has a lot of good easy-to-follow advice on how to tame your raging debt. I hope this one will be out in June on Lulu.com and the others after that.

And finally, it's time for me to get cracking on Murder by the Mile, the third book in the Measurements of Murder(tm) series. Bernard, Lisa, and the chief will be tangling with another murderer, but even worse, they'll have to contend with a wedding, tons of crazy relatives, a murderous marathon, old girlfriends with fiendish plans, old boyfriends just to make things worse ... It should be a fun, exciting book. I'm looking forward to see how it turns out.

That's my writing plans. My health plans include going to the various doctors until I find one who can help me. And then I will drain him dry of every bit of medical knowledge he has and leave his shattered husk by the side of the road and go on to live forever. Ahem.

As for my current health, not much has changed. I continue to cough blood, no worse but no better. I still have problems with the new medicine, but that's getting better. Or I'm getting used to it.

I haven't walked in several days, but intend to start again after Mikey leaves. Speaking of which, we're having a great time with Mikey. I know you get tired of me saying how smart, sweet, and funny he is .. but he's so smart, sweet, and funny!

As for work, I'm slowly conquering the new system. I like several things about it, dislike many things about it, and will have to adapt to it no matter what because that's how they're going to do things now and that's that.

Well, I have to get to work so I'll close. Hope you have a wonderful day!

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Monday, March 16, 2009

Join Facebook! No, really ...

Join Facebook so that you can Friend me and then join the Stephen B. Bagley's Books group. I'm aiming for at least 100 people, and we have 78 so far. Come join us! You'll be glad you did. Well, I'll be glad you did, and making me happy is what's important. I think we're all agreed on that ...

We're having a wonderful time with Mikey. As always, his boundless energy is exhausting us, but it's a joy to have him here. His ability to read amazes me. I complimented him about it and he said matter-of-factly, "Of course. I'm a genius, you know." And I did know that, actually.

Anyway, I got home tonight and went to bed around 8:30 after supper, errands, and getting beat by Mikey on the Wii. I woke up a few minutes ago and decided to post real quick before it's tomorrow. I hope your day went well. Hope your tomorrow does, too. And now, good night!

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Sunday, March 15, 2009

Alexander Justice

My roomie's fourth grandson and fifth grandchild was born Friday, March 13. Alexander Justice was 7.4 pounds and a little less than 19 inches long.

Here are some of his first photos:

Born on Friday the 13th, he will be lucky his whole life.


Held by his Papa Eric


Held by his big sister




Hope you have a great week!

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Thursday, March 12, 2009

$$$?

For those interested -- and let's assume that's all of you -- I switched to lemon ginseng flavored green tea today. Much better. Well, drinkable, anyway.

This leads us naturally to discuss the economy. (What? I don't see the link, you say. Well, there isn't one. Are you happy now that you've pointed it out? Sit down and be quiet.) And the economy is bad.

How bad is it?

Stop that, it's not a joke! Well, I guess there is some humor in learning that our number of billionaires have decreased. Apparently many of them are only mega-millionaires now. How will they live? You just know they're not going to be able to use food stamp cards or know the proper etiquette for the soup line. Poor sad millionaires. My heart goes out to them, but not very far.

So bad economy. It's certainly touched my town. Money is tight, tight, tight. People are being laid off. Businesses are closing. Dogs and cats are living together without the benefit of clergy. Will this nightmare ever end?

Probably not, particularly since the best our leaders have been able to come up with is for us to spend more money. That's right. We consumers need to consume more. We have an economy that requires the majority of people participating in it to spend more. How did that happen? How did we let it happen?

A little simple math would tell us that an economy couldn't grow forever. Not without careful planning. And one thing we Americans have been shown repeatedly is that our government apparently cannot plan.

I'll be coming back to this over the next few months and offering more thoughts on our economy and what we can do to weather these lean times. But for now, it's late and I need sleep!

Talk to you soon.

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Wednesday, March 11, 2009

The Green Tea Blues

So I was drinking my new green tea this morning and kept smelling the scent of freshly mown grass and thinking of spring and flowers and then realized that the smell was coming from my cup and that it truly tasted like it smelled. I had been drinking citrus green tea, but couldn’t find it last time at Wal-Mart so I decided to move up to the harder stuff. Just green tea with no flavor enhancers, nothing to keep my tastebuds from experiencing the unvarnished taste of that noble herb.

I’ve been drinking green tea every morning and at noon for some time now. I can’t say it’s changed my life, but the health benefits of GT are well documented now. It’s a fantastic anti-inflammatory and anticancer drink. Four cups of it a day load you up with antioxidants, eager to sweep those nasty cancer-causing free radicals from your body. Here’s a link to tell you more about its benefits than you wanted to know: More than you wanted to know about green tea's health benefits.

Thus I have added it to my daily diet. But this new stuff … wow … After a couple of more gulps and gags, I decided to add a bit of sweetener to it. I usually drink it straight, going on the assumption that the pure form is best. I don’t need no stinkin’ sweetness, I’d say to myself. This taste, however, was defeating me completely.

So I added one level teaspoon of sweetener to it and stirred well. Then I took a sip. I hadn’t thought I could make it worse. I was wrong, of course. Now I was drinking sweet, hot mown grass extract. Whee. I made a face and drained the glass, much like the way I’d take medicine. Then I shuddered so hard I shook the floor while my entire digestive tract attempted to leave my body for someone else who wouldn’t do that to it.

I’m sure the flavor will grow on me. That which does not kill us makes us stronger and really, really cranky. You were warned.

How are you today?

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Saturday, March 07, 2009

Doctor's report

Here's what I learned from the OKC doctor I saw Friday.

1. He believes I have Sjögren's ("SHOW-grins") Syndrome. Sjögren's is a chronic disease in which white blood cells attack the moisture-producing glands. Learn more here: The Sjögren's Syndrome Foundation.

2. Besides Sjögren's, he believes I also have a secondary autoimmune disease. The tests Friday were to find out what it is. We'll have the results from them later this month.

3. He started me on the drug Plaquenil aka hydroxychloroquine. After a month as we find out how I tolerate Plaquenil, he will add a second drug or third, depending on what the secondary autoimmune disease turns out to be.

4. He also believes that I do not have lung cancer. Instead, he believes I have "chronic pneumonia" caused by ongoing inflammation in my lungs.

5. Whatever is going on with me, is serious and life-threatening, but he believes we can control it and perhaps over time even reverse some of the damage done to my organs.

6. Speaking of organs, my liver has taken "much damage." With the drugs controlling my raging immune system and if I lose weight, my liver should recover. If not, I will be looking for a liver transplant within "five to 10 years."

7. Autoimmune disorders are "not curable, but they are controllable."

8. The costs for this treatment are ... unpleasant. Friday alone cost me nearly $1,500, with the visit and the tests. Thank the Good Lord for credit cards. And now I must go and rob a bank.

9. I return to him Monday, April 6th. We get test results, take more tests, and add more drugs to my treatment regime if things go well.

And that's about it. I feel somewhat encouraged by the visit. He seemed to think he could really help me, and I'm ready to not feel as bad as I do. So I'm hopeful this is the beginning of the healing.

I appreciate your prayers and support. You all have been a great blessing to me. Talk to you soon.

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Thursday, March 05, 2009

Making up

I know I’ve been gone for a few days. I’ll try to make up for it with an extra-long entry today covering all sorts of things. How’s that? I knew that would excite you. Let’s get started.

Health

Nothing new here. I’ll go to a new doctor in OKC tomorrow morning. I hope I finally start getting answers there. I’m also hoping that we start treating the problem rather than just doing more tests. I’m ready to start spending money I don’t have on treatments.

I’m still walking at the fitness center almost every evening. It’s slowly getting easier, but I’m sure not where I should be by a long shot. Still, I’m proud that I’ve hung in there this long. A few more months and I bet I’ll see a huge improvement. Overall, I think I have more endurance and stamina.

I haven’t lost any weight, however. I’m not really that disappointed about that. I’m walking to improve my health. Besides, if the odds go against me and I turn out to have cancer in some form, having a reserve is a good thing. I well remember how thin my father got as he fought his cancer.

My good friend Kyra and my roomie walk with me almost every time. My roomie always does, but sometimes we miss Kyra. They both take good care of me. I’ve only had one low blood sugar incident there, which means, I think, that my body is adjusting to the exercise. I’m sure not setting any speed records, but slowly and surely I’m getting better.

Oakleaf Harbor

I haven’t been working on my Cafepress store much lately. No sales at all discouraged me a bit, but also I just haven’t had the energy. I’m pretty wiped out after going to the fitness center, but that’s improving. This weekend I plan to add more people’s names to the Jesus Loves … section. In the pipeline are: Beverly, Michelle, Grace, Glory, Richard, Dolores, Todd, Morgan, Mikayla, Zackary, Samantha, Joey, Michael, and Jordan. I hope to get all those done this weekend. I’m going to be using a new flowered background for the ladies. I hope they like it.

Facebook

Yes, I’m Facebooking now. If you’re Facebooking, Friend me! If you’re not Facebooking, start and then friend me. And if you do, I’ll send you an invite to the Stephen B. Bagley Books group page on FB.

So far, I’ve mostly found FB to be a lot of fun. However, FB is going to make some major changes next week, supposedly to make it more like Twitter. I am not a Twitter fan. So we’ll see. I will be trying to hang here at this blog more.

Writing

Not much is going on. My health and fatigue issues have consumed me. If I sit still long, I sleep! But I haven’t given up on Murder by the Mile and still plan for it to come out this year.

I am, however, co-authoring a book with my friend Gail Claunts. It should be out in May on Lulu and in July or August on Amazon. More details on this as the project comes together. The title is 75 Dates for $25 or Less!

And that's all for today. More tomorrow I hope!

Click here to order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
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Click here to order Murder by the Acre in hardcover, exclusively from Lulu.com.
Click here to order merchandise designed by Stephen B. Bagley