Thursday, December 27, 2012

My first theme song for 2013

The song is really speaking to me, especially after a pep talk today from my friend Stacy.

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

40 percent off!

Hey, Happy 2nd Day of Christmas! And here's a great deal! Lulu is offering Tales from Bethlehem at 40 percent off today only! Use coupon code 26DEC at checkout! Here's the link: Tales from Bethlehem.

(Here's the fine print from Lulu: Enter the coupon code listed above at checkout to redeem this promotion. Sorry, but this offer is only valid in US Dollars and cannot be applied to previous orders. You can only use this code once per account, and unfortunately you can't use this coupon in combination with other coupon codes. This great offer expires at 11:59 PM PST, so don't miss out! While very unlikely, we do reserve the right to change or revoke this offer at anytime, and of course we cannot offer this coupon where it is against the law to do so.)

Tuesday, December 25, 2012



Gaudete, gaudete! Christus est natus
Ex Maria virgine, gaudete!
Tempus adest gratiæ
Hoc quod optabamus,
Carmina lætitiæ
Devote reddamus.
Deus homo factus est
Natura mirante,
Mundus renovatus est
A Christo regnante.
Ezechielis porta
Clausa pertransitur,
Unde lux est orta
Salus invenitur.
Ergo nostra contio
Psallat iam in lustro;
Benedicat Domino:
Salus Regi nostro.


Rejoice, rejoice! Christ is born
(Out) Of the Virgin Mary — rejoice!
The time of grace has come —
what we have wished for,
songs of joy
Let us give back faithfully.
God has become man,
To the wonderment of Nature,
The world has been renewed
By the reigning Christ.
The closed gate of Ezekiel
Is passed through,
Whence the light is born,
Salvation is found.
Therefore let our gathering
Now sing in brightness
Let it give praise to the Lord:
Greeting to our King.

Monday, December 24, 2012

An explanation of sorts

Recently someone at a Christmas gathering asked me how I consistently came up with these hilarious, intelligent, wise, heart-warming, inspiring, cheery and witty posts. (I'm just quoting.) I will tell you right now that I am simply gifted. If you buy that, then I will also sell you a few expired lottery tickets.

Truthfully I suspect my output -- such as it is -- is connected to the warped way I look at the world. My mind is given to literal fantasies, if you can follow that, but if not, don't give up. An example follows so calm down.

For instance, suppose someone tells me that his or her heart raced like mad. For most people, that would simply mean that the person speaking was excited. But my mind instantly imagines a heart riding on a horse, the reins held by its little veins and arteries as it spurs its horse to the finish line. Then I have to wonder what it's wearing its spurs on. And what weirdo would make the spurs for a heart, anyway? And spurs need boots ...

I can while away hours doing this, hours that I should be spending losing weight, cleaning my car, stalking Lucy Lawless, cataloging my belly lint collection, etc., all the fairly normal activities of someone who was dropped on his head just a few too many times when he was a baby by his jealous siblings, but that is another story and is neither here nor there, but somewhere around Albuquerque.

Another factor is that I like language, particularly funny words. Like halibut. Now, that is a funny word. Just say it over and over to yourself. Halibut, halibut, ha-li-but. Come on. You're not doing it. Halibut, halibut ... We're not going to continue until you do. Okay, that's better. Isn't that a great word? Tomorrow, say, "Merry Christmas and Happy New Halibut to you and yours!" Next week at work, just say, "Good halibut," instead of "Good morning," and when people ask you how you are, just answer, "Perfectly halibut." Your whole day will be filled with joy, topped off by getting a nice, white coat that will button in an delightfully odd way.

It also helps that we live in a funny world. Well, peculiar is probably the word I should use there, but funny works. You can find humor in most things non-Republican, and even Republicans have been known to crack a smile when an endangered species finally croaks. I find that you have to laugh at some things or you will spend all your time weeping and wailing. Frankly, sackcloth itches, and ashes only get in your eyes, and you can quote me if you are so inclined and wish to send me money since this post is copyrighted 2012.

As for the number of ideas, those come because I read a lot and am interested in almost everything that you can legally be interested in. Right now, I am reading a book on hyperspace, a Southern Sisters murder mystery, a computer book, a book on Biblical archaeology and a book on how to have a second date when the police got called on the first one. This gives me a lot of fodder for humor cannons.

I am also somewhat a klutz in the way that President Clinton was somewhat a liar. I can trip over lint in the carpet and have even stumbled due to the pressure of air molecules. This leads to those wonderful experiences that make great stories afterwards -- Remember the time I fell on the large nun who has holding her pet cat and she threw it in the midst of all those preschoolers who were eating chocolate ice cream? -- but are painful when they happen.

I also have the rare talent of being able to insert both of my feet in my mouth and occasionally have needed to borrow the feet of passing strangers just to fill up that cavernous space that persists in embarrassing me. And no, I will not print any examples. There are enough stories wandering around about me as is.

And finally it helps that my family is made up of such strongly individualistic people. Not only do we march to a different drummer, but we have often marched to an entirely different band than the rest of the world, a band made up of flutes, kazoos, tubas and perhaps a halibut or two.

 From Return of the Floozy, Copyright 2012 by Stephen B. Bagley. All rights reserved. No copying without express prior written permission from the author and publisher. Thank you for reading.

Merry Christmas!

° * _██_*˚°。°/♥ \*˚°。°*。°*★*˚°。°*。°*★*˚°。°*。°*★
˛ . (´• ̮•)*. 。*/♫.♫\*˛.* ˛ _Π_____*˚°。*。°*❤*˚°。°*。°*
. ° ( . • .) ˛° . /• '♫ '•\.˛*./_______/~\*˚°。°*。°*°*❤ ˚°*★
.* (.. '•'..) *˛ ╬╬╬╬╬˛°.|田田❤|門|╬╬╬╬╬*˚°。°*。°* ♥
★*˚°。°*。°*。★ *˚°。°*。°*。★*˚°。°*。°˚°★*˚°。°*。★
★*˚°。°*。°*。★ *˚°。°*。°*。★*˚°。°*。°˚°★*˚°。°*。★

Sunday, December 23, 2012


Sorry I've been away. Always assuming anyone still reads Harbor Street. Hard to tell. This is the first year since 2002 that I haven't posted any Christmas Celebration posts, but no one has mentioned it to me. Reminds me of how I'd work so hard to create a family calendar each year, but when I got ill one holiday and didn't make it, not one family member asked about it. The gift I thought was so valued turned out not to be, so I never made another one. To this day, no one has ever asked me why I stopped making them.

It's been a wild year, filled with both tragic and joyous events. And it was the year that supposedly the Mayans predicted would be the End of Days. Or not. The world was supposed to end December 21, but of course, it didn't. We're still here.

We have this fascination about ancient civilizations and often attribute them with scientific and mystic knowledge beyond ours. We should ask that if they were so awesomely powerful, why aren't they around now? Of course, their descendants exist, but none of them hold the power their ancestors did. I guess. After all, our modern appliances and gadgets would seem very god-like to such ancient peoples.

Anyway, I'm back. The world's still here. All our problems and joys remain. We still remain. And that's a good thing.

Monday, December 17, 2012

Review: Warpaint

Warpaint by author Holly Lisle continues the story began in Hunting the Corrigan's Blood, which is Cadence Drake's quest to rid the universe of vampires.

This time the stakes are much larger; the vampire plague is spreading at a terrifying rate. This may be humanity's final days as a free species. Darkout is the term for this extinction event, and Cadence and a brave group of friends throw themselves against the rising tide.

This is not a mindless vampire adventure story. Cadence and her team have to be wise, clever, and fast to stop Darkout. Many of their solutions are twisty and surprising.

I especially enjoyed the discussion and debate about their actions. It's rare to find characters who truly question their actions and the possible repercussions. Cadence and the team read as real people and behave accordingly.

Hints of a possible future romance are in this story, but the story mostly focuses on this fight to the death -- or maybe fight to the undeath. Cadence is carrying a heavy burden, and her desire for vengeance propels her toward a horrifying choice.

Buy this book. Read this book. You'll be pleased.

Disclosure: I received an advance PDF copy of this book.

Thursday, December 13, 2012

You're invited!

The second book signing for Tales of Bethlehem by Stephen B. Bagley is today (Thursday, Dec. 13) at the Ada Public Library, 4:30-6:30 p.m. There will be cookies, appreciation prizes, registration for a drawing for more than $100 of books and merchandise, and, of course, books, books, and more books!

Here's what's in the drawing:
EndlesS by Stephen B. Bagley,
On Target: Devotions for Modern Life by Kelley Benson,
Floozy & Other Stories by Stephen B. Bagley,
Fashion reading glasses with metal case from Dr James Kevin Cunningham of your Ada Vision Source,
Murder by the Acre (Second Edition) by Stephen B. Bagley,
Creations 2012 by Ada Writers,
Norman Rockwell 2013 Calendar from State Farm,
Murder by the Acre kitchen magnet,
Music sampler CD from Christian artist Doug Matlock,
Europa pocket notebook by Eccolo,
Designer bookmarks,
Christmas mug with salt water taffy,
Water bottle with pens from Vision Bank inside,
CD of Christmas music,
and chocolate kisses!

Thursday, December 06, 2012

Reception for TFB

Stephen B. Bagley at the reception and book signing for Tales from Bethlehem held November 29 at Karen's Art & Framing, 108 East Main, Ada.

Saturday, December 01, 2012

Book signing!

Here's the story that my local paper ran on the upcoming book signing for Tales from Bethlehem at the Ada Public Library, Thursday, Dec. 13, from 4:30-6:30 p.m. There will be table prizes, registration for a drawing for more than $100 in books and merchandise, Christmas cookies, and books! What more could you need?