18,000

      It looks like I'm going to lose another 18,000 words from the old version of Murder by the Acre. Excuse me while I indulge in a bit of violent heaving. Remember when I said my murderer killed someone I wasn't expecting. Well, that someone -- surprise, surprise, surprise -- was all over the middle third of the old version of the book. When that person wasn't talking, people were talking about him/her. Sigh. So I thought, "Okay, I don't want to lose 18,000 words so I'll just un-kill the victim. I'll lose about 1,000 words that way, but not nearly a third of the old book."
      Problem solved. Right? RIGHT? No. The new version with that person dead is better than the old version. Much better, curse it all. It makes perfect sense that the murderer would eliminate that person. In fact, it was a flaw in the old version that the murderer never killed that person. Once my subconscious –- oh evil subconscious -- finally brought that to my attention, I realized that I couldn’t un-kill the victim. It’s a better story with that murder.
      So what does that mean? What? Well, it means that I’m just lazy and I just going to have to adjust to the fact that I’m going to have to rewrite most of the rest of the book, too. Whee. I can’t really express my despair at this other than with explosives.
      Okay. Fine. I can do that. Nothing worthwhile is easy. And the book can still come out in June, only a month later than my revised plan, without me killing myself to get it written. Or rewritten as the case may be. And I still may be able to use about 10,000 words from the old version so not all is lost.
      I’m okay with this. Really I am. Other than bouts of fury and sobbing, I’m fine. Oh, and the drinking. And the lovely fires I’m setting to relieve stress. But the word for me is fine. Let’s say it together: Fine. Fine. FINE!
      Otherwise, I’m fine. And the words are coming. We have over 25,000 keepers now. The goal is 500 words a day now. Two pages a day. Two keeper pages. I have a mad desire to laugh madly at this point.
      Oh, hey, I got a new robot. Yes, I did. I’ll try to post a video of it tomorrow. Something for you to look forward to. I’m always thinking of you, you know. You and you and you, but not you. I’m mad at you, you hussy. But you and you and you and you, too. All the rest of you, too.
      Have a great day tomorrow. And if tomorrow doesn’t come through for you, I want you to stand up proudly, reach out a hand, and grab tomorrow’s throat and choke the living crap out of it. Because we’re not going to have bad days anymore. And if we do, a lot of people are going to, too. I trust you understand where I’m coming from. I’m in the house with you. I’m right behind you. Can't you feel my breath on your neck?
      Night!