The whole issue of gay marriage is like walking through a minefield: It doesn't matter where you step, you're probably going to get blown up. Naturally I don't expect my words to change anyone's opinion one way or another. I just wanted to point out a hypocrisy.
Now, mind you, I'm a straightforward guy. You tell me what you believe, and I'm going to go from there. I might like your stance, dislike it, whatever, but I recognize it's your stance and that you have a right to it. One of my chief dislikes is a liar, those people who say one thing but do another or even believe another.
I work in the financial world, an industry that includes banking, insurance and other money-oriented occupations. You will find that most, if not all, of these oppose gay marriage and make quiet contributions to organizations fighting gay marriage.
They're not doing it to defend marriage. They're not doing it because they dislike homosexuals. They're not even doing it to win friends. (You'll notice you don't see ads from large corporations saying that they're against gay marriage.) No, the only reason they're doing it is money. They don't want to extend benefits to same-sex partners. They save millions by not doing so, and they want to continue to save that money. It's simple math.
Benefits are already under siege in the corporate world. As healthcare costs have soared, benefits have been cut back. A surprising number of companies are offering more money and less benefits. That seems odd, but studies show that benefits cost companies as much or more than salaries.
Insurance companies in particular oppose gay marriage. It's obvious why. They don't want to pay for the medical bills of anyone that they don't have to. This is not limited to same-sex partners. They don't want to pay for your live-in girlfriend or your common law husband, either, and they're not all that crazy about paying for you.
This is not a rant against corporations and their drive to make money. They run a business. They want to stay in business. I can understand it. What I can't abide is the coating it's given.
Recently I got to hear a manager go on and on about a company's opposition to gay marriage. He brought up how the company believed in defending marriage and morality and making America a better place until the flag was waving and the choir was singing. But, as he later told me, it was a lie. His company had studied the issue and concluded that gay marriage would cost them money. They got questioned on their stance by an employee and thus the spin. Their position was decided by their study, not because of their morality.
This offends me on a couple of levels. First, the dishonesty. If your company opposed gay marriage because of the cost, fine. Say so. Take your lumps. Be realistic about it. Yes, I know you're probably going to get some bad press, but it will at least be honest bad press. Have a backbone.
Second, by using religion and America to support a position that you really don't believe, you're just cheapening both of them. We'd be a much better nation if we'd stop treating religion, democracy, freedom, America and patriotism as spin words and started respecting the things we say we do.
11 comments:
Well said! I too am tired of pundits spinning their web of lying words to mislead the public. The war in Iraq is the perfect example of this. True freedom will only be achieved when we have true honesty from our elected officials.
I read this post with interest, particularly since gay marriage affects me as I am a gay man. I've never heard this slant on gay marriage. In this country, we tend to treat large corporations as the enemy with unlimited pockets to care for us. Yet corporations flounder often. This doesn't mean that I concede I shouldn't have benefits if I'm married to my partner, but it is something to consider in the whole scheme of it.
I would also like to point out there are corporations who support gay rights and flourish. Disney for instance. If a corporation is ruled only by the money motive, then I can see why they would oppose gay marriage. If they actually believe in individual freedom, they should support it.
And, I suspect for many gays in long-term relationships, it's all about the money, too. There are financial advantages to a legally sanctioned relationship--in our society that relationship is called marriage.
Although, with the point you make, if gays stopped fighting for marriage and began fighting for what people opposed to marriage for them say would be acceptable--partnership benefits which grant the legal protection achieved by marriage (and these would not be limited to gays but long-term partnerships for a myriad of reasons), then the companies wouldn't have a leg to stand on and would have to come up with another reason--also exposing them for the misrepresentation of their original position.
(And to add to Slym's comments about corporations supporting partners, I learned this week nearly all if not all of the major American auto makers extend benefits to partners. In fact, one organization just began urging a boycott of Ford for doing so.)
As a Christian, I oppose homosexuality. However, I do support gay marriage. That might seem to be in conflict. But I believe in individual freedom. What adults do behind closed doors is between God and them. Gay marriage makes sense because it will encourage long-term relationships and less free sex (which spreads AIDS). As for corporations that make their decisions based on the dollar, it's obvious what they worship.
Please do not misunderstand me. I have several lesbian friends, but I do not approve of their lifestyle. They know it. I don't preach at them. Having said that, I do not think they should be discriminated against for their choice.
BWAHAHAHAHA!!!
Thank you, Joel, for that enlightened viewpoint ... :)
TECH, very smart, verry well-written view.
Gloria: I continue to struggle with the idea. Your comments, too, give me good food for thought.
Awesome post.
The sugar they feed us only lasts for a bit until we take that eventual "come down" and stand to say "Wait a minute...?"
In the business I work, similar to your own, I think, I see the same types of definitions put onto decisions. "The reasons are this..." Which make it all sound so, understandable. But when you see the truth of the matter and the real reasons behind their actions, having worked within those "reasons", it gives me a rather sour taste in my mouth. I wish my own company would be more honest. I wish they would admit, that they discriminate on the basis of money.(just my personal opinion that they do. cheap disclaimer there) Perhaps discriminate is a tough word. But, I work in a world of actuararials, laws of large numbers etc. Rarely do we take into account the exceptions, the truth of a particular matter or just seeing a person as an individual. I, for one, don't like to be blanketed within a group. But, I don't expect special treatment, either. Being grouped in a certain type of "people" can be discriminating, just as much as being singled out as a certain type, can be.
At any rate, it is sad that honesty takes a back seat to political correctness and profit margins.
Thank you, Thepress. My position has been attacked many times by other Christians, but I believe it's the correct one. It's the only one that my conscience will allow.
Excellent post, Tech. The irony, however, is that many corporations would actually discover they would make MORE money if they didn't hold such a bigoted position. As a couple of folks mentioned, there are many corporations which are thriving while extending benefits to domestic partners. It's taken a brave effort on the part of their managers to pioneer this position, but long term it is paying off in many, many ways.
I don't approve of homosexuality, nor do i believe it is genetic. apart from that, I couldn't care less if they marry each other or not. My approval or disapproval means nothing. They don't have to answer me. They have to answer to their Creator. God help them.
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