This afternoon

      I'm going to stop pretending to know what will happen to me in this mess. I went to the surgeon this afternoon expecting only to talk to him and maybe a brief examination. And I thought we would schedule the surgery.
      But no, instead we did needle biopsies. (I should have realized we were going to do something when he kept marking on me with a felt-tipped pen, but I didn't, not having it done before.) The left side of my chest is swelled up like a balloon -- a cliche, but I'm too doped up on pain pills to do better. The biopsy needle looked as big a drill bit. Okay, not that large, but it was large enough that I could see the hole in it. And tomorrow I'm going to the hospital for an ultrasound and a couple of other tests.
      Then I will meet with the surgeon again next Tuesday at 3:30 after he gets the results, and we'll see what happens from there.
      The surgery will happen soon after, but these tests will reveal how much I will need and how serious it is. I feel better knowing that at last I will have some answers; even if they turn out to not be the answers I hope for, it will be better than this uncertainty.
      Because he had numbed my side, it didn't hurt so I returned to work. Big mistake. By the end of the day, my side was letting me know it had holes in it. It was unhappy. So I came home, took some pain pills and slept until now.
      I like the surgeon. He seemed knowledgeable and sympathetic. He gave clear explanations and answered all my questions.
      So even though my side feels like a ferret is gnawing on it (not a cliche, but not very good, either) I feel better about my medical care. Anyway, that's the news. I'm going to go take some pills and go back to bed. Catch you tomorrow when we have yet another medical adventure.