A few months back, a friend asked how I could bear to bare so much of my life to the general public. A clever question (bear to bare) but he didn't realize how much was left out of this blog. Things happen, and I can't share them either because the other people involved wouldn't want me to or because I am unable to share them for reasons of my own. This is an edited version of my life. Maybe the life I'd like to have.
Of course, we all do this. Different faces for different people. Sometimes the change is major, sometimes minor. Some people deny they do this. They like to claim that they are same for everyone. I've discovered they are always liars. Maybe that's what we humans are. A race of liars.
I once heard an upright minister preach about how what drove Adam and Eve from the Garden wasn't disobedience, per se, but rather that they lied about their disobedience to God. The angel and flaming sword were to punish their lying tongues, and that's what would happen to us if we lied, according to him, a flaming sword in our souls. (Later on, that same minister would lose his pulpit and his family for cheating on his wife with the church secretary. I wonder how that flaming sword felt.)
I don't have any conclusions to draw here. Maybe something about life and the need for illusions or the benefits of a nice, comfortable lie. Maybe about how we can lie our way to a truth, maybe not an absolute truth, but a truth nonetheless. I don't know. Maybe you should just lie yourself to a conclusion. It's not hard. You can do it. Just close your eyes and open your mouth and lie. That's the way to do it ...
6 comments:
I am sorry and wish you whatever help you need. I will pray that things work out. I love you.
Roen
Thanks, Roen. You're a sweetie.
"Ah, the truth, what a thing it is! I sacrifice so much for it, with people: I forego, for truth’s sake, discretion, loyalty, diplomacy, tact, polite manners, elegance, grace, poise, balance, good taste, conformity, image-role, fashionableness, polish, confidences, promises, ambition, consistency, identity, clarity, comprehensibleness, good will, hypocrisy, and lots of other things—amass sacrifice, at truth’s altar. God! is truth worth it? I hope it is. It better be, in fact."~Marvin Cohen, U.S. author and humorist.
Sending you a (((hug)))
Hugs, Tech. All of us present different faces in different places. I think the best we can hope for is that there is a solid, common core thread true to a responsible person doing the best they can to be true to the common moral code. Too often we fail. At best we fall short.
In the Christian world, that is why we have Baptism and Salvation. We can never live up to the idea. In other faith systems, I believe there are comparable atonement mechanisms. I think it's the thing that gives us hope and the ability to try again.
Tech, I am so sorry for whatever event it was that brought you such obvious pain. It cuts sharp enough and deep enough that we can all feel it through your words. May God wrap his protective hand around you and let this wound find a way of healing, even if it takes a long time.
I don't know, Tech. Sometimes I think truths are only perceptions. In this finite world, we may never know the Ultimate truths. Still, it is your choice what to tell - we only expose what we are comfortable with. That level of comfort is different for each blogger. May you find comfort and peace soon my friend.
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