Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Dream

I had a strange dream last night. I visited an old friend of mine. It's been at least 20 years since I saw her last. She picked me up at a huge airport, and I was so grateful when I saw her among the crowd. Somehow I ended up driving her car, and I drove her deep into the country where she made her home. The visit was filled with awkward silences -- after all this time, we had little in common -- and it was hard to keep a conversation going. Her house was a cottage, like what you see in on those British shows, all flowers and knitted comforters. I think she had a cat. Throughout the dream, we kept avoiding some subject, and while I knew we were avoiding talking about it, I couldn't recall what it was. I wanted to ask her a question, but I knew she wouldn't answer, and her refusal would embarrass us both, particularly since I couldn't pin down the question. I sensed she regretted my visit, and I wanted to leave myself, but I had no car and no way to get back to the airport. Finally I woke up.

Then I realized what the question was that I had wanted to ask, but wasn't able to think of in the dream: How was I able to visit her when she had died in a car wreck nearly twenty years ago?

I got out of bed, made a cup of green tea, and sat at my computer until it was time to get ready for work.

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3 comments:

Anonymous said...

sounds like a book
roen

SBB said...

Not one I want to write! It gave me the creeps.

Trixie said...

Oh Tech, that is haunting. I have had similar dreams. But the overlying theme has been that I'm driving in some large, vibrant city (usually Dallas for some odd reason.) I'm in my car, but wind up off the major highways into a dead-end path. Sometimes it turns into a walking trail at a zoo. And then I'm back in the car trying to get where I want to go, but I am in the back seat of the car and my dad is driving.

He died in 1976 -- I have figured out the message of these dreams is that I am still letting him dominate my life and I need to get back in the driver's seat and take control of my life.