And so the year is ending, and the 2009 Harbor Street Christmas Celebration is closing, too. Around town people are already packing up their Christmas decorations, and putting an end to another holiday season. It's sad how eager some of them are to get back to "normal" and to resume daily life. Perhaps their Christmas was sad or tiresome, perhaps their daily life is packed with excitement ... I don't know.
I do know that I'm always melancholy when Christmas ends. Nothing except cold winter months to soldier through, nothing to look forward to except spring and it seems so far away. But it will come. Always does.
Outside right now a cold drizzle is falling. Damp more than wet, chilly more than cold, grey clouds rather than black. A nothingness as it were. A muffled quiet. Time to keep the house warm, break out the daylight lamp, wrap clothes around you to keep away the insidious grey. It will creep into your soul if you let it.
But not tonight. Tonight I'm going to bask in the glow of a new approaching year. Of new changes and new adventures. New possibilities. New blessings. Of course, there will be disasters and mistakes and probably a few terrible things, but I found the perfect quote for this. Agatha Christie once said, "I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing."
So I'm glad we're all still alive, racing into the undiscovered country together. I pray that God will shower you with the blessings of health, wealth, and joy in 2010! Together with Him, we are unstoppable. God bless you and see you in the new year.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Monday, December 28, 2009
HSCC: Just when you thought it was safe ...
HSCC continues! Yes, you thought it was safe to return to the blog, but you were WRONG! My Christmas won't officially end until Sunday, Jan. 3, so endure -- I mean -- ENJOY a few more days of that Yuletide cheer! Or else ...
Saturday my roomie and I drove up to Shawnee to meet my family at the Cracker Barrel there. We talked, ate (and yes, I stayed low carb), took pictures, and generally had a good time. Afterwards, my brother's family and my roomie and I went the Shawnee Mall and walked around for a couple of hours. First mall I've been to in several years. I tried to buy some sugar-free jelly beans in the candy store in the mall, but they didn't have them. Other than purchasing a present for one of my roomie's grandson, I didn't buy anything. Oops, I take that back. I did buy myself a sweater on sale at JCPenney's.
The drive back home was much better than the drive up. Our area received the snow and ice you saw in the news -- my town got 6-7 inches of the nasty stuff -- and the roads were slick. But by the time we started home, the roads were much better with only a couple of miles that were still covered by ice.
Sunday I cleaned house, put away Christmas gifts, did laundry, washed dishes, and generally was as productive as I could be between long periods of napping like a bear. I'm going miss all the wonderful Christmas concerts that had been showing on TV lately. I enjoyed them.
Speaking of things I miss, my friend's blog are mostly silent these days. Still, Michelle has been posting updates so that's good. Frenzied Feline hasn't updated since November, but I do like the template she's using. Nice, isn't it? I used to be able to nag FF into blogging, but my nagging powers have diminished and she ignores me now. Jean has moved her blog to a new site -- update your links accordingly -- but it's still active. Jean is a fellow writer, and I like hearing about her struggles and successes with her novels. Erudite Redneck continues to stir the political and life pot over on his blog. I'm grateful he's still out there swinging. Although she doesn't have a link to my blog, I've been reading EJ's blog lately. EJ has three books out on Lulu.com that I intend to buy at my next paycheck. You can buy them here. Adam has been posting but has taken a break again. Sigh. Really, my friends need to post something interesting for me to read EACH AND EVERY DAY!
What else? I'm ready for summer. So very ready for warmth and sunshine and glorious long days. Love Christmas and Thanksgiving; they're grand and help make winter bearable. My heart, however, belongs to summer.
And now, I'm going to share a few Customer Service Tips that will doubtlessly help you during these holiday shopping days if you work retail or in any other way interact with the public.
From The Anti-Customer Service Training Manual
Customer Service Tip #13: Not only is the customer not always right, sometimes they are batweasel crazy. When this happens, take a deep breath and remember they're not worth you going to prison.
Customer Service Tip #56: It's not your customer's fault he/she is loathsome. That's what happens when first cousins marry. Be kind.
Customer Service Tip #87: I don't care what Willy in Receiving says; drinking when you're busy on your job is a bad thing. For one thing, you might get fired ... Wait, let me think about this some more.
Customer Service Tip #134: In most social circles, it's considered impolite to leap the service counter and snatch your customer baldheaded. Remember this, and you'll be welcome everywhere.
Customer Service Tip #159: If the customer has money and you'll do anything to get it, this means conventional wisdom is wrong: Customer service IS the oldest profession in the world.
Customer Service Tip #176: Bad breath and body odor will only drive away the most sensitive customers. It's not worth the risk of tooth decay and disease. So go ahead and brush your teeth and shower once in a while. Deodorant is, of course, optional.
Customer Service Tip #211: Bitterness is never attractive. Learn to fake sincerity, and your customers will love you until you turn on them like a mad badger and gnaw their legs off.
Customer Service Tip #236: Never tell a customer you're going to have him/her hunted down and killed in the street like a dog. It will upset them. No, let it be a total surprise when it happens.
Copyright 2009 by Stephen B. Bagley. Excerpted from The Anti-Customer Service Training Manual.
And now I think we'll close. I'll be talking with you tomorrow. Same blog channel, same blog time. Or something like that.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Saturday my roomie and I drove up to Shawnee to meet my family at the Cracker Barrel there. We talked, ate (and yes, I stayed low carb), took pictures, and generally had a good time. Afterwards, my brother's family and my roomie and I went the Shawnee Mall and walked around for a couple of hours. First mall I've been to in several years. I tried to buy some sugar-free jelly beans in the candy store in the mall, but they didn't have them. Other than purchasing a present for one of my roomie's grandson, I didn't buy anything. Oops, I take that back. I did buy myself a sweater on sale at JCPenney's.
The drive back home was much better than the drive up. Our area received the snow and ice you saw in the news -- my town got 6-7 inches of the nasty stuff -- and the roads were slick. But by the time we started home, the roads were much better with only a couple of miles that were still covered by ice.
Sunday I cleaned house, put away Christmas gifts, did laundry, washed dishes, and generally was as productive as I could be between long periods of napping like a bear. I'm going miss all the wonderful Christmas concerts that had been showing on TV lately. I enjoyed them.
Speaking of things I miss, my friend's blog are mostly silent these days. Still, Michelle has been posting updates so that's good. Frenzied Feline hasn't updated since November, but I do like the template she's using. Nice, isn't it? I used to be able to nag FF into blogging, but my nagging powers have diminished and she ignores me now. Jean has moved her blog to a new site -- update your links accordingly -- but it's still active. Jean is a fellow writer, and I like hearing about her struggles and successes with her novels. Erudite Redneck continues to stir the political and life pot over on his blog. I'm grateful he's still out there swinging. Although she doesn't have a link to my blog, I've been reading EJ's blog lately. EJ has three books out on Lulu.com that I intend to buy at my next paycheck. You can buy them here. Adam has been posting but has taken a break again. Sigh. Really, my friends need to post something interesting for me to read EACH AND EVERY DAY!
What else? I'm ready for summer. So very ready for warmth and sunshine and glorious long days. Love Christmas and Thanksgiving; they're grand and help make winter bearable. My heart, however, belongs to summer.
And now, I'm going to share a few Customer Service Tips that will doubtlessly help you during these holiday shopping days if you work retail or in any other way interact with the public.
From The Anti-Customer Service Training Manual
Customer Service Tip #13: Not only is the customer not always right, sometimes they are batweasel crazy. When this happens, take a deep breath and remember they're not worth you going to prison.
Customer Service Tip #56: It's not your customer's fault he/she is loathsome. That's what happens when first cousins marry. Be kind.
Customer Service Tip #87: I don't care what Willy in Receiving says; drinking when you're busy on your job is a bad thing. For one thing, you might get fired ... Wait, let me think about this some more.
Customer Service Tip #134: In most social circles, it's considered impolite to leap the service counter and snatch your customer baldheaded. Remember this, and you'll be welcome everywhere.
Customer Service Tip #159: If the customer has money and you'll do anything to get it, this means conventional wisdom is wrong: Customer service IS the oldest profession in the world.
Customer Service Tip #176: Bad breath and body odor will only drive away the most sensitive customers. It's not worth the risk of tooth decay and disease. So go ahead and brush your teeth and shower once in a while. Deodorant is, of course, optional.
Customer Service Tip #211: Bitterness is never attractive. Learn to fake sincerity, and your customers will love you until you turn on them like a mad badger and gnaw their legs off.
Customer Service Tip #236: Never tell a customer you're going to have him/her hunted down and killed in the street like a dog. It will upset them. No, let it be a total surprise when it happens.
Copyright 2009 by Stephen B. Bagley. Excerpted from The Anti-Customer Service Training Manual.
And now I think we'll close. I'll be talking with you tomorrow. Same blog channel, same blog time. Or something like that.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Friday, December 25, 2009
HSCC: The Christmas Story
The Christmas Story
Luke 2:1 And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be taxed.
2:2 (And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.)
2:3 And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city.
2:4 And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:)
2:5 To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with Child.
2:6 And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered.
2:7 And she brought forth her firstborn Son, and wrapped Him in swaddling clothes, and laid Him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.
2:8 And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.
2:9 And, lo, the angel of the LORD came upon them, and the glory of the LORD shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.
2:10 And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.
2:11 For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the LORD.
2:12 And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the Babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.
2:13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying,
2:14 Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.
2:15 And it came to pass, as the angels were gone away from them into Heaven, the shepherds said one to another, Let us now go even unto Bethlehem, and see this thing which is come to pass, which the LORD hath made known unto us.
2:16 And they came with haste, and found Mary, and Joseph, and the Babe lying in a manger.
2:17 And when they had seen it, they made known abroad the saying which was told them concerning this Child.
2:18 And all they that heard it wondered at those things which were told them by the shepherds.
2:19 But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart.
2:20 And the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen, as it was told unto them.
2:21 And when eight days were accomplished for the circumcising of the Child, His Name was called JESUS, which was so named of the angel before He was conceived in the womb.
Matthew 2:1 Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, there came wise men from the east to Jerusalem,
2:2 saying, Where is he that is born King of the Jews? for we have seen his star in the east, and are come to worship him.
2:3 When Herod the king had heard these things, he was troubled, and all Jerusalem with him.
2:4 And when he had gathered all the chief priests and scribes of the people together, he demanded of them where Christ should be born.
2:5 And they said unto him, In Bethlehem of Judea: for thus it is written by the prophet,
2:6 And thou Bethlehem, in the land of Judah, art not the least among the princes of Judah:
for out of thee shall come a Governor, that shall rule my people Israel.
2:7 Then Herod, when he had privily called the wise men, inquired of them diligently what time the star appeared.
2:8 And he sent them to Bethlehem, and said, Go and search diligently for the young child; and when ye have found him, bring me word again, that I may come and worship him also.
2:9 When they had heard the king, they departed; and, lo, the star, which they saw in the east, went before them, till it came and stood over where the young child was.
2:10 When they saw the star, they rejoiced with exceeding great joy.
2:11 And when they were come into the house, they saw the young child with Mary his mother, and fell down, and worshipped him: and when they had opened their treasures, they presented unto him gifts; gold, and frankincense, and myrrh.
***
I hope you have a safe, happy, and healthy Christmas filled with God's love for us and the love of your family and friends. Have a wonderful day.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Luke 2:1 And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be taxed.
2:2 (And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.)
2:3 And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city.
2:4 And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:)
2:5 To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with Child.
2:6 And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered.
2:7 And she brought forth her firstborn Son, and wrapped Him in swaddling clothes, and laid Him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.
2:8 And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.
2:9 And, lo, the angel of the LORD came upon them, and the glory of the LORD shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.
2:10 And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.
2:11 For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the LORD.
2:12 And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the Babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.
2:13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying,
2:14 Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.
2:15 And it came to pass, as the angels were gone away from them into Heaven, the shepherds said one to another, Let us now go even unto Bethlehem, and see this thing which is come to pass, which the LORD hath made known unto us.
2:16 And they came with haste, and found Mary, and Joseph, and the Babe lying in a manger.
2:17 And when they had seen it, they made known abroad the saying which was told them concerning this Child.
2:18 And all they that heard it wondered at those things which were told them by the shepherds.
2:19 But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart.
2:20 And the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen, as it was told unto them.
2:21 And when eight days were accomplished for the circumcising of the Child, His Name was called JESUS, which was so named of the angel before He was conceived in the womb.
Matthew 2:1 Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, there came wise men from the east to Jerusalem,
2:2 saying, Where is he that is born King of the Jews? for we have seen his star in the east, and are come to worship him.
2:3 When Herod the king had heard these things, he was troubled, and all Jerusalem with him.
2:4 And when he had gathered all the chief priests and scribes of the people together, he demanded of them where Christ should be born.
2:5 And they said unto him, In Bethlehem of Judea: for thus it is written by the prophet,
2:6 And thou Bethlehem, in the land of Judah, art not the least among the princes of Judah:
for out of thee shall come a Governor, that shall rule my people Israel.
2:7 Then Herod, when he had privily called the wise men, inquired of them diligently what time the star appeared.
2:8 And he sent them to Bethlehem, and said, Go and search diligently for the young child; and when ye have found him, bring me word again, that I may come and worship him also.
2:9 When they had heard the king, they departed; and, lo, the star, which they saw in the east, went before them, till it came and stood over where the young child was.
2:10 When they saw the star, they rejoiced with exceeding great joy.
2:11 And when they were come into the house, they saw the young child with Mary his mother, and fell down, and worshipped him: and when they had opened their treasures, they presented unto him gifts; gold, and frankincense, and myrrh.
***
I hope you have a safe, happy, and healthy Christmas filled with God's love for us and the love of your family and friends. Have a wonderful day.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Thursday, December 24, 2009
HSCC: One Christmas Star
By Stephen B. Bagley
It
does
not seem
much against
the darkness of this world:
one light in a midnight sky, a pinpoint
of illumination seen by Magi and lonely shepherds.
Yet, strange as it seems, nothing has
let us see as clearly as He
alone heralded
by that one
Christmas
Star.
© 2009 by Stephen B. Bagley. All rights reserved.
***
Talk to you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Monday, December 21, 2009
HSCC: Delicious party dip
This is delicious and healthy low carb dip for your Christmas party. Where is my invitation?
Mexican Salsa
3 medium tomatoes, seeded and chopped
1 can (15 ounces) black beans, rinsed and drained
3/4 cup fresh or frozen corn
1/2 cup finely chopped red onion
1/2 cup chopped red pepper
1 jalapeno pepper, finely chopped
2 tablespoons minced fresh cilantro
1/4 cup lime juice
1 garlic clove, minced
1 teaspoon dried oregano
1 teaspoon ground cumin
1/2 teaspoon salt
Combine all ingredients and let sit for two hours in fridge so flavors mingle. Serve with baked tortilla chips. Good eating!
***
I forgot to update you on my Friday doctor visit. Not much happened there. They took blood for tests, and I'm waiting for results again. At this time -- unless the tests show something different -- I'm not going to have to go on insulin. Instead they're going to adjust my oral meds. So far, so good.
Oh, and this low carb diet I'm on is actually letting me lose weight. 11 pounds so far. Cool, eh? Of course, the doctor told me that the weight loss is going to slow down as my body adjusts to it, but he still thinks I should continue to lose 3-5 pounds a month. And while it hasn't been pleasant -- I miss bread, soft drinks, sweets -- it's been okay. And frankly, it's a small price to pay for better health.
And now a bit of music. Sing!
We Wish You a Merry♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪ Christmas♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪We Wish You a Merry ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪Christmas ♥ ♥ ♥We Wish You A Merry ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪Christmas ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪...And A Happy New Year!♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪...
Did you sing? I didn't hear you. Let's do it again louder!
We Wish You a Merry♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪ Christmas♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪We Wish You a Merry ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪Christmas ♥ ♥ ♥We Wish You A Merry ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪Christmas ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪...And A Happy New Year!♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪...
There! That was much better!
***
I hope everything is going well for you. I miss all the blogging most of you used to do. Facebook ruined the blogs. I hate that. Talk to you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Mexican Salsa
3 medium tomatoes, seeded and chopped
1 can (15 ounces) black beans, rinsed and drained
3/4 cup fresh or frozen corn
1/2 cup finely chopped red onion
1/2 cup chopped red pepper
1 jalapeno pepper, finely chopped
2 tablespoons minced fresh cilantro
1/4 cup lime juice
1 garlic clove, minced
1 teaspoon dried oregano
1 teaspoon ground cumin
1/2 teaspoon salt
Combine all ingredients and let sit for two hours in fridge so flavors mingle. Serve with baked tortilla chips. Good eating!
***
I forgot to update you on my Friday doctor visit. Not much happened there. They took blood for tests, and I'm waiting for results again. At this time -- unless the tests show something different -- I'm not going to have to go on insulin. Instead they're going to adjust my oral meds. So far, so good.
Oh, and this low carb diet I'm on is actually letting me lose weight. 11 pounds so far. Cool, eh? Of course, the doctor told me that the weight loss is going to slow down as my body adjusts to it, but he still thinks I should continue to lose 3-5 pounds a month. And while it hasn't been pleasant -- I miss bread, soft drinks, sweets -- it's been okay. And frankly, it's a small price to pay for better health.
And now a bit of music. Sing!
We Wish You a Merry♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪ Christmas♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪We Wish You a Merry ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪Christmas ♥ ♥ ♥We Wish You A Merry ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪Christmas ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪...And A Happy New Year!♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪...
Did you sing? I didn't hear you. Let's do it again louder!
We Wish You a Merry♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪ Christmas♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪We Wish You a Merry ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪Christmas ♥ ♥ ♥We Wish You A Merry ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪Christmas ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪...And A Happy New Year!♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪...
There! That was much better!
***
I hope everything is going well for you. I miss all the blogging most of you used to do. Facebook ruined the blogs. I hate that. Talk to you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Sunday, December 20, 2009
HSCC: Cool affordable gifts
1. Purchase a pretty clear glass jar with a lid. Buy M&Ms or different types of chewing gum or other candies and fill jar. Decorate jar with nice stickers. (Scrapbooking stores have stickers that look great.) Put bow on top. Excellent gift for co-worker or teacher.
2. Purchase plain pillar candles in various colors. Cut Post-it notes into star shapes or purchase stickers. Stick on candle. Or use masking tape to create stripes. Using paint brush or sponge, dab gold and/or silver paint on pillars. Or use any color desired. Paint should be water based and not flammable. Do not use oil or alcohol paints of any kind. When finished painting, carefully remove tape and/or Post-its to allow the pillar's color to show. Let dry overnight. Bind two or three together with a pretty ribbon.
3. Purchase small wooden picture frame. Remove glass. Cover frame with stickers or hot-glue foreign coins on it or paste used postage stamps of various designs on it. Place photo inside of you with the person you've giving it to. Or a travel photo. Or cut a Christmas card front to fit frame.
4. A couple of packages of specialty coffee make a perfect gift for your caffeine junkie. Include a few bottles of various flavorings for a special treat.
5. Gift cards and gift certificates. Easy to send through the mail as the enclosure of a Christmas card. Add that saved postage to the gift card amount for a really jolly Christmas.
6. Bake some cookies and put them in a glass jar with a lid that has a bow on top. Many stores have sugar cookies with a design already in the dough.
***
Talk to you tomorrow.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
2. Purchase plain pillar candles in various colors. Cut Post-it notes into star shapes or purchase stickers. Stick on candle. Or use masking tape to create stripes. Using paint brush or sponge, dab gold and/or silver paint on pillars. Or use any color desired. Paint should be water based and not flammable. Do not use oil or alcohol paints of any kind. When finished painting, carefully remove tape and/or Post-its to allow the pillar's color to show. Let dry overnight. Bind two or three together with a pretty ribbon.
3. Purchase small wooden picture frame. Remove glass. Cover frame with stickers or hot-glue foreign coins on it or paste used postage stamps of various designs on it. Place photo inside of you with the person you've giving it to. Or a travel photo. Or cut a Christmas card front to fit frame.
4. A couple of packages of specialty coffee make a perfect gift for your caffeine junkie. Include a few bottles of various flavorings for a special treat.
5. Gift cards and gift certificates. Easy to send through the mail as the enclosure of a Christmas card. Add that saved postage to the gift card amount for a really jolly Christmas.
6. Bake some cookies and put them in a glass jar with a lid that has a bow on top. Many stores have sugar cookies with a design already in the dough.
***
Talk to you tomorrow.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Saturday, December 19, 2009
HSCC: Random
I've been wandering around my head lately, and in that vast echoing space, I found a few random thoughts about Christmas that I thought I'd share with you.
I don't like Santa Claus. I mean, those guys who dress up as Santa. Their suits never fit, and they always seem surly. Or drunk. I don't think they're happy, but listen, the Easter bunny's not having a good time, either. It's tough all over.
I also don't like ornaments or decorations that show Santa kneeling at the Nativity. That's just weird. Yes, I understand the symbolism of it, but it's still weird.
Do Santa’s reindeer poop as they fly overhead? Perhaps that's what happens to people who make the naughty list.
Playboy runs this ad where they offer a video of their Playmates in which the ad says "It's the perfect Christmas gift for your husband." Seriously, what wife buys that for her husband? None do. And I think they know that no wife would. It's just their way of trying to disguise the whole creepiness of it. Hey, it's Christmas. Let’s celebrate the season and watch some porn! Ho, ho, ho.
Why do the local weathermen always seem so pleased when bad weather happens? They can barely contain their joy as they tell us about icy sleet and dangerous roads. Are they that bored? The next time that Channel 19 guy starts grinning as he tells us how terrible the weather is going to be, I'm going to hunt him down and introduce him to the business end of a 2x4.
People in California and Florida receive too much sun in December. It bakes their brains. When you walk on their beaches, you think that you smell suntan lotion, but it's actually brains frying in coconut oil. The vendors sell them in cones.
I want to get too much sun, though. I want to lie on those beaches. I want to sip cold, fruity drinks with umbrellas in them and enjoy the sights and sounds of the ocean as the breeze brings me the faint hint of frying brains.
My Christmas village is cool. I've enjoyed setting it up. But the other day as I was moving the figurines around, my roomie came up to me, looked at the lovely and peaceful village and said, "It figures you'd like playing with dolls." He's funny. And fast, too. I missed him with both shots.
Gift bags are truly good things. I don't care what Martha Stewart says. I do like Martha, though. I think she's hot -- in that strange, horrible perfectionist way. If you dated her, you couldn't just kiss her or hold her hand. You'd have to make some sort of presentation of the whole thing with fresh cut flowers and ice cold caviar and handmade chocolate sweets. She'd be too much trouble. That's why I don't date her. That and the fact I don't know her.
And I think that's enough randomness for today. Hope things are going well for you. I'll talk with you tomorrow.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
I don't like Santa Claus. I mean, those guys who dress up as Santa. Their suits never fit, and they always seem surly. Or drunk. I don't think they're happy, but listen, the Easter bunny's not having a good time, either. It's tough all over.
I also don't like ornaments or decorations that show Santa kneeling at the Nativity. That's just weird. Yes, I understand the symbolism of it, but it's still weird.
Do Santa’s reindeer poop as they fly overhead? Perhaps that's what happens to people who make the naughty list.
Playboy runs this ad where they offer a video of their Playmates in which the ad says "It's the perfect Christmas gift for your husband." Seriously, what wife buys that for her husband? None do. And I think they know that no wife would. It's just their way of trying to disguise the whole creepiness of it. Hey, it's Christmas. Let’s celebrate the season and watch some porn! Ho, ho, ho.
Why do the local weathermen always seem so pleased when bad weather happens? They can barely contain their joy as they tell us about icy sleet and dangerous roads. Are they that bored? The next time that Channel 19 guy starts grinning as he tells us how terrible the weather is going to be, I'm going to hunt him down and introduce him to the business end of a 2x4.
People in California and Florida receive too much sun in December. It bakes their brains. When you walk on their beaches, you think that you smell suntan lotion, but it's actually brains frying in coconut oil. The vendors sell them in cones.
I want to get too much sun, though. I want to lie on those beaches. I want to sip cold, fruity drinks with umbrellas in them and enjoy the sights and sounds of the ocean as the breeze brings me the faint hint of frying brains.
My Christmas village is cool. I've enjoyed setting it up. But the other day as I was moving the figurines around, my roomie came up to me, looked at the lovely and peaceful village and said, "It figures you'd like playing with dolls." He's funny. And fast, too. I missed him with both shots.
Gift bags are truly good things. I don't care what Martha Stewart says. I do like Martha, though. I think she's hot -- in that strange, horrible perfectionist way. If you dated her, you couldn't just kiss her or hold her hand. You'd have to make some sort of presentation of the whole thing with fresh cut flowers and ice cold caviar and handmade chocolate sweets. She'd be too much trouble. That's why I don't date her. That and the fact I don't know her.
And I think that's enough randomness for today. Hope things are going well for you. I'll talk with you tomorrow.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Friday, December 18, 2009
HSCC: Christmas Prayers
A Christmas Prayer
We thank you for this place in which we dwell,
for the love that unites us,
for the peace accorded us this day,
for the hope with which we expect the morrow,
for the work, the health, the food,
and the bright skies which make our lives delightful
for our friends in all parts of the earth.
Robert Louis Stevenson (1850-1894)
Christmas Prayer of Pope John XXIII
O sweet Child of Bethlehem,
grant that we may share with all our hearts
in this profound mystery of Christmas.
Put into the hearts of men and women this peace
for which they sometimes seek so desperately
and which you alone can give to them.
Help them to know one another better,
and to live as brothers and sisters,
children of the same Father.
Reveal to them also your beauty, holiness and purity.
Awaken in their hearts
love and gratitude for your infinite goodness.
Join them all together in your love.
And give us your heavenly peace. Amen.
Pope John XXIII (1881-1963)
Nativity Prayer of St. Augustine
Let the just rejoice,
for their justifier is born.
Let the sick and infirm rejoice,
For their saviour is born.
Let the captives rejoice,
For their Redeemer is born.
Let slaves rejoice,
for their Master is born.
Let free men rejoice,
For their Liberator is born.
Let All Christians rejoice,
For Jesus Christ is born.
St. Augustine of Hippo (AD 354-440)
Christmas dinner prayer by Martin Luther
Ah, dearest Jesus, holy Child,
Make thee a bed, soft, undefiled,
Within my heart, that it may be
A quiet chamber kept for Thee.
My heart for very joy doth leap,
My lips no more can silence keep,
I too must sing, with joyful tongue,
That sweetest ancient song,
Glory to God in highest heaven,
Who unto man His Son hath given
While angels sing with pious mirth.
A glad new year to all the earth!
Martin Luther (1483-1546)
***
Talk to you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
We thank you for this place in which we dwell,
for the love that unites us,
for the peace accorded us this day,
for the hope with which we expect the morrow,
for the work, the health, the food,
and the bright skies which make our lives delightful
for our friends in all parts of the earth.
Robert Louis Stevenson (1850-1894)
Christmas Prayer of Pope John XXIII
O sweet Child of Bethlehem,
grant that we may share with all our hearts
in this profound mystery of Christmas.
Put into the hearts of men and women this peace
for which they sometimes seek so desperately
and which you alone can give to them.
Help them to know one another better,
and to live as brothers and sisters,
children of the same Father.
Reveal to them also your beauty, holiness and purity.
Awaken in their hearts
love and gratitude for your infinite goodness.
Join them all together in your love.
And give us your heavenly peace. Amen.
Pope John XXIII (1881-1963)
Nativity Prayer of St. Augustine
Let the just rejoice,
for their justifier is born.
Let the sick and infirm rejoice,
For their saviour is born.
Let the captives rejoice,
For their Redeemer is born.
Let slaves rejoice,
for their Master is born.
Let free men rejoice,
For their Liberator is born.
Let All Christians rejoice,
For Jesus Christ is born.
St. Augustine of Hippo (AD 354-440)
Christmas dinner prayer by Martin Luther
Ah, dearest Jesus, holy Child,
Make thee a bed, soft, undefiled,
Within my heart, that it may be
A quiet chamber kept for Thee.
My heart for very joy doth leap,
My lips no more can silence keep,
I too must sing, with joyful tongue,
That sweetest ancient song,
Glory to God in highest heaven,
Who unto man His Son hath given
While angels sing with pious mirth.
A glad new year to all the earth!
Martin Luther (1483-1546)
***
Talk to you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Thursday, December 17, 2009
HSCC: Holiday Greeting from my old school
I attended this college for two years. Of course, back then it was called Westark Community College, and it was only a two-year school. It didn't have the fancy bell tower and landscaping or some of the buildings, but I sure enjoyed my time there.
Speaking of greetings, I'm still working on my Christmas cards, but intend to finish them this weekend. They have to be mailed Monday. Or even Saturday morn if I get really ambitious, but I doubt that. We'll see how it goes. Hey, where's my card from you?
How are things going for you? How's the holiday shaping up for you? I'm thinking about and praying for all of us. Talk to you tomorrow.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Speaking of greetings, I'm still working on my Christmas cards, but intend to finish them this weekend. They have to be mailed Monday. Or even Saturday morn if I get really ambitious, but I doubt that. We'll see how it goes. Hey, where's my card from you?
How are things going for you? How's the holiday shaping up for you? I'm thinking about and praying for all of us. Talk to you tomorrow.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
HSCC: December darkness
What really annoys me -- among all the other things that really annoy me -- is that depression doesn't leave us alone at the holidays. One of the reasons I try to celebrate Christmas with such abandon is to hold off the gathering darkness. So I buy presents, put up lights, decorate my tree, display my Christmas village, send Christmas cards, watch Christmas specials, and generally make myself too busy to think about failures and losses. Yes, I know, not very Christmasy, but true nonetheless.
I know people who dislike the holidays because it reminds them of what they don't have, be it loving family or someone who passed on or the money to buy their kids the latest gadgets. A friend of mine who lost her mother at Christmas many years ago still holds Christmas responsible. She doesn't celebrate it. In fact, she hates it. I mostly avoid her during this time of year, or if I see her, I make sure we discuss everything except Christmas.
I also try to avoid people who enjoy sharing their misery. I have friends who have made discouragement into their daily diet. They say they don't want to bring anyone else down, but they do. Oh, they're funny and cynical and modern, but I have to stay away from them because my darkness doesn't need feeding. Maybe the difference is -- or the reason why they can be so cynical without it affecting them -- is my darkness has teeth. It's hurt me both physically and mentally in the past. And while I'm miles away from that bleak point, I'm still close enough to see how easy it would be to fall into the abyss.
So I celebrate Christmas. That one light in the darkness, the lowly manger, the Child King. There's a lot of hope in that stable if you can make it past all the things we put in front of it. A lot of hope and joy. Bear with me if you think I overdo Christmas and remember why. And if you want to join me, then come on. Together we'll have a great holiday despite ourselves.
Talk to you tomorrow.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
I know people who dislike the holidays because it reminds them of what they don't have, be it loving family or someone who passed on or the money to buy their kids the latest gadgets. A friend of mine who lost her mother at Christmas many years ago still holds Christmas responsible. She doesn't celebrate it. In fact, she hates it. I mostly avoid her during this time of year, or if I see her, I make sure we discuss everything except Christmas.
I also try to avoid people who enjoy sharing their misery. I have friends who have made discouragement into their daily diet. They say they don't want to bring anyone else down, but they do. Oh, they're funny and cynical and modern, but I have to stay away from them because my darkness doesn't need feeding. Maybe the difference is -- or the reason why they can be so cynical without it affecting them -- is my darkness has teeth. It's hurt me both physically and mentally in the past. And while I'm miles away from that bleak point, I'm still close enough to see how easy it would be to fall into the abyss.
So I celebrate Christmas. That one light in the darkness, the lowly manger, the Child King. There's a lot of hope in that stable if you can make it past all the things we put in front of it. A lot of hope and joy. Bear with me if you think I overdo Christmas and remember why. And if you want to join me, then come on. Together we'll have a great holiday despite ourselves.
Talk to you tomorrow.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
HSCC: A gift!
This is a link to a free digital issue of Reader's Digest. I think it's quite cool, particularly the free music that you can download. I hope you enjoy it. Here's the link: Holiday Reader's Digest
If you come across anything like this, share it with us. I hope your month is going well. I go back to the doctor Friday for a follow up visit. I'll let you know how it goes.
Talk to you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
If you come across anything like this, share it with us. I hope your month is going well. I go back to the doctor Friday for a follow up visit. I'll let you know how it goes.
Talk to you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Monday, December 14, 2009
HSCC: Catching up
How are you doing as we speed toward Christmas? I'm running behind, of course, but I have accomplished a few things. Let's list them so I can bask in your praise.
1. The December issue of the family newsletter has been mailed. Whew! And I refuse to work on the January issue until January arrives. I'm quite proud of this issue. It's the largest one I've ever produced and features some mighty fine writing if I do say so myself and I do. I hope the recipients enjoy it. If not, I hope they pretend they do. I just want praise. I'm not requiring sincerity.
2. I have most of my Christmas shopping done. I need to sit down and see exactly what I've bought and what I need, but I ordered some stuff from Amazon today, and I think that just about finishes it up except for one gift still be ordered. And now will come the wrapping. Well, the bagging. I'm not much of a wrapper.
3. My Christmas tree and lights outside are up. The lights outside still need a couple of strands on one bush, but otherwise, that will be it. Oh, my Christmas village is up, and I'm quite please with how it turned out this year. I'll take some photos of it and post them soon.
4. I'm working on my Christmas cards. Sigh. That's a lot of work, but I should have them ready to mail by Thursday. I hope.
5. Blood sugar is staying in the mid-100s. Very annoying. I'd like it lower. I go back to the doctor Friday morning. I don't think he'll put me on insulin at this time, but I don't know. I suspect he'll adjust my oral meds. I'll let you know what we decide.
6. I've been doing really well on my low carb diet. Oh, I've cheated a few times, but nothing major. I've lost 11 pounds in one month; most of that I attribute to not drinking soft drinks and avoiding sweets and other delicious carbs. I confess I feel bad a lot as my body gets used to this, but it's getting better.
7. I've been converted to diet Dr Pepper. It's not as good as the real thing, but you know, it's not bad at all. In fact ... it's good.
I hope things are going well for ya. Talk to you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
1. The December issue of the family newsletter has been mailed. Whew! And I refuse to work on the January issue until January arrives. I'm quite proud of this issue. It's the largest one I've ever produced and features some mighty fine writing if I do say so myself and I do. I hope the recipients enjoy it. If not, I hope they pretend they do. I just want praise. I'm not requiring sincerity.
2. I have most of my Christmas shopping done. I need to sit down and see exactly what I've bought and what I need, but I ordered some stuff from Amazon today, and I think that just about finishes it up except for one gift still be ordered. And now will come the wrapping. Well, the bagging. I'm not much of a wrapper.
3. My Christmas tree and lights outside are up. The lights outside still need a couple of strands on one bush, but otherwise, that will be it. Oh, my Christmas village is up, and I'm quite please with how it turned out this year. I'll take some photos of it and post them soon.
4. I'm working on my Christmas cards. Sigh. That's a lot of work, but I should have them ready to mail by Thursday. I hope.
5. Blood sugar is staying in the mid-100s. Very annoying. I'd like it lower. I go back to the doctor Friday morning. I don't think he'll put me on insulin at this time, but I don't know. I suspect he'll adjust my oral meds. I'll let you know what we decide.
6. I've been doing really well on my low carb diet. Oh, I've cheated a few times, but nothing major. I've lost 11 pounds in one month; most of that I attribute to not drinking soft drinks and avoiding sweets and other delicious carbs. I confess I feel bad a lot as my body gets used to this, but it's getting better.
7. I've been converted to diet Dr Pepper. It's not as good as the real thing, but you know, it's not bad at all. In fact ... it's good.
I hope things are going well for ya. Talk to you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Saturday, December 12, 2009
HSCC: 12 Factoids About Christmas
1. One acre of living Christmas trees generates enough oxygen to meet the daily requirement for 18 humans. Approximately 1,000,000 acres are used to grow Christmas trees yearly.
2. The top six Christmas tree producing states are: Oregon, Michigan, Washington, Wisconsin, Pennsylvania and North Carolina. About 30,000,000 trees are harvested in an average year. Two to three Christmas trees are planted for every one harvested.
3. Mango and banana trees are Christmas symbols in India, where Christians use mango leaves for holiday decorations.
4. The poinsettia is named for the first U.S. ambassador to Mexico, botanist Joel Roberts Poinsett. Poinsett introduced the plant that would become known as poinsettia into the United States in 1829.
5. The word yule, from Middle English, means "to cry aloud."
6. More than 3 billion Christmas cards are mailed each year in the United States.
7. With some 50,000,000 copies sold so far and still climbing, Irving Berlin's "White Christmas," recorded in 1942 by Bing Crosby, is still the best-selling single in history.
8. Geographically speaking, the North Pole is the point on Earth that is the true top of the planet where all lines of longitude converge. The Geomagnetic North Pole is the point on the Earth that marks the northern focus of the geomagnetic field that surrounds the globe. It lies in Greenland, 78 degrees 30 minutes North, 69 degrees West. Compasses, however, point to the Magnetic North Pole, which is about 1,000 miles south of the geographic North Pole, near Ellef Ringness Island in northern Canada. A lesser-known North Pole, the Northern Pole of Inaccessibility, represents the furtherest point in all directions from any coastline. About 700 miles from the nearest land, this pole is located north of Alaska at 84 degrees 03 minutes North, 174 degrees 51 minutes West. By the way, illustrator Thomas Nast was the first to put Santa Clause's home at the North Pole. In 1882, he drew Santa sitting on a box labeled, "Christmas Box 1882, St. Nicholas, North Pole."
9. There are about 5,000,000 reindeer in the world. They are threatened by habitat loss and global warming and are seeing their population drop yearly.
10. Making popcorn garlands is one of the few Christmas traditions born in the United States.
11. The post office handles more than 70,000 letters each year addressed to Santa at the North Pole.
12. The Twelve Days of Christmas traditionally started on Christmas. Many European counties still keep this tradition, particularly parts of Spain and France.
Sources: The Christmas Almanac, The National Arbor Day Foundation, The Association of Popcorn Producers, The United States Postal Service and MTV News.
***
See you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
2. The top six Christmas tree producing states are: Oregon, Michigan, Washington, Wisconsin, Pennsylvania and North Carolina. About 30,000,000 trees are harvested in an average year. Two to three Christmas trees are planted for every one harvested.
3. Mango and banana trees are Christmas symbols in India, where Christians use mango leaves for holiday decorations.
4. The poinsettia is named for the first U.S. ambassador to Mexico, botanist Joel Roberts Poinsett. Poinsett introduced the plant that would become known as poinsettia into the United States in 1829.
5. The word yule, from Middle English, means "to cry aloud."
6. More than 3 billion Christmas cards are mailed each year in the United States.
7. With some 50,000,000 copies sold so far and still climbing, Irving Berlin's "White Christmas," recorded in 1942 by Bing Crosby, is still the best-selling single in history.
8. Geographically speaking, the North Pole is the point on Earth that is the true top of the planet where all lines of longitude converge. The Geomagnetic North Pole is the point on the Earth that marks the northern focus of the geomagnetic field that surrounds the globe. It lies in Greenland, 78 degrees 30 minutes North, 69 degrees West. Compasses, however, point to the Magnetic North Pole, which is about 1,000 miles south of the geographic North Pole, near Ellef Ringness Island in northern Canada. A lesser-known North Pole, the Northern Pole of Inaccessibility, represents the furtherest point in all directions from any coastline. About 700 miles from the nearest land, this pole is located north of Alaska at 84 degrees 03 minutes North, 174 degrees 51 minutes West. By the way, illustrator Thomas Nast was the first to put Santa Clause's home at the North Pole. In 1882, he drew Santa sitting on a box labeled, "Christmas Box 1882, St. Nicholas, North Pole."
9. There are about 5,000,000 reindeer in the world. They are threatened by habitat loss and global warming and are seeing their population drop yearly.
10. Making popcorn garlands is one of the few Christmas traditions born in the United States.
11. The post office handles more than 70,000 letters each year addressed to Santa at the North Pole.
12. The Twelve Days of Christmas traditionally started on Christmas. Many European counties still keep this tradition, particularly parts of Spain and France.
Sources: The Christmas Almanac, The National Arbor Day Foundation, The Association of Popcorn Producers, The United States Postal Service and MTV News.
***
See you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Friday, December 11, 2009
HSCC: More Music!
I found these three videos and thought they were all very well done. I hope you enjoy them.
***
See you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
***
See you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Thursday, December 10, 2009
HSCC: Christmas Groaners
1. What do monkeys sing at Christmas ?
Jungle Bells, Jungle bells...
2. What do you get if you cross an apple with a Christmas tree ?
A pineapple.
3. What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?
Horn-aments.
4. What would a reindeer do if it lost its tail?
She'd go to a re-tail shop for a new one.
5. Why is Prancer always wet?
Because he's a rain-deer.
6. Which of Santa's reindeer has bad manners?
Rude-olph.
7. What do reindeer always say before telling you a joke?
This one will sleigh you.
8. How does Rudolph know when Christmas is coming?
He looks at his calen-deer.
9. What do you give a reindeer with an upset tummy?
Elk-a-seltzer.
10. How do you get into Donner's house?
You ring the deer-bell.
11. What's red and white and gives presents to gazelles?
Santelope.
12. Did Rudolph go to a regular school?
No, he was elf-taught.
13. Why did Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer cross the road?
Because he was tied to a chicken.
14. Why do reindeer wear fur coats?
Because they look silly in snowsuits.
15. What do elves learn in school?
The Elf-abet.
16. If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?
Missletoe.
17. Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
Because he had low elf esteem.
18. Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
So he can hoe-hoe-hoe.
19. Where do polar bears vote?
The North Poll.
20. What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas time?
Sandy Claws.
21. What do you call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.
+++
Talk to you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Jungle Bells, Jungle bells...
2. What do you get if you cross an apple with a Christmas tree ?
A pineapple.
3. What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?
Horn-aments.
4. What would a reindeer do if it lost its tail?
She'd go to a re-tail shop for a new one.
5. Why is Prancer always wet?
Because he's a rain-deer.
6. Which of Santa's reindeer has bad manners?
Rude-olph.
7. What do reindeer always say before telling you a joke?
This one will sleigh you.
8. How does Rudolph know when Christmas is coming?
He looks at his calen-deer.
9. What do you give a reindeer with an upset tummy?
Elk-a-seltzer.
10. How do you get into Donner's house?
You ring the deer-bell.
11. What's red and white and gives presents to gazelles?
Santelope.
12. Did Rudolph go to a regular school?
No, he was elf-taught.
13. Why did Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer cross the road?
Because he was tied to a chicken.
14. Why do reindeer wear fur coats?
Because they look silly in snowsuits.
15. What do elves learn in school?
The Elf-abet.
16. If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?
Missletoe.
17. Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
Because he had low elf esteem.
18. Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
So he can hoe-hoe-hoe.
19. Where do polar bears vote?
The North Poll.
20. What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas time?
Sandy Claws.
21. What do you call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.
+++
Talk to you tomorrow!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Wednesday, December 09, 2009
HSCC: 3 ... 2 ... 1 ...
3 Nifty Things to do with old Christmas cards
1. A friend of mine shared this cool idea with me. She wanted to send out Christmas cards, but couldn't make the time to address them each year. So she purchased a box of labels and handwrote each address on a label, adding embellishments and black and white stickers. Then she took them to a copy store and had the labels copied in various colors. Nifty! She also took colored pens and filled in some of the stickers. Of course, she could have used a computer program like PrintShop or PrintMaster to do this, but she liked the handwritten look.
2. You can buy blank cards at your local office supply store, print your message inside, and then paste the front of old cards as the front of the new cards. Another friend actually takes the front of the old cards and uses it as a postcard by drawing a dividing line down the middle, writing her greeting on the left, and placing the address and stamp on the right.
3. You can decorate with old cards by arranging them on your mantel or by punching holes in them and stringing them as a garland or by creating a Christmas card tree on an undecorated wall by arranging the cards in a tree shape. You can also cut old cards into gift tags for presents or cut them into interesting shapes to paste on gifts wrapped in white craft paper.
If you have a Nifty Christmas Idea, please share it with us!
2 Recipes From My Sister's Kitchen
My sister is an incredible cook. Here are two of her delicious recipes.
Mexican Quick Comfort Soup
1 can of chicken broth
1 can of chicken
1 can of chopped tomatoes & mild green chilies
2 stalks of chopped celery
1 chopped medium sweet onion
1/2 bag of baby carrots, sliced thinly
1 teaspoon of butter
1 heaping teaspoon of flour
1 small can of mushrooms
Black pepper to taste
Put a small amount of olive oil in the bottom of a heavy skillet. Turn heat up to medium. Add onions, celery, and carrots. Cook until the onions are transparent. Put in large heavy pot. Add remaining ingredients. Cover and bring to a boil.
Add one teaspoon of butter to the first skillet. Melt butter, and then add a heaping teaspoon of flour. Cook flour until it begins to change color. Drain one small can of mushrooms. Pour the liquid into the skillet. Stir until smooth. Then pour the mixture and the mushrooms into the pot.
Turn the heat down to low. Replace the lid. The chilies will increase in heat the longer they cook, but you can add a small can of chopped green chilies. This will open your sinuses! You can replace the mushroom liquid with 1/4 cup of milk and then add a two-inch block of grated Velveeta cheese to the soup with the thickened roux. Tasty!
All the Children of the World Chili
1 can of Red beans
1 can of Yellow beans (Garbanzo)
1 can of Black beans
1 can of White beans (navy)
1 can of Brown beans (pinto)
1 large can of pureed tomatoes
1 large can of diced tomatoes
1 package of mild chili seasoning
1 chopped yellow or white onion
1 1/2 lb. hamburger
Brown hamburger and add onions. Drain excess fat. Put meat and onions into crock-pot. Add all beans and tomatoes. Stir in the seasoning mix. Cook on low for at least eight hours or overnight. Yummy!
1 Christmas Joke
A Russian couple was walking down the street in St. Petersburg the other night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose. "I think it's raining," he said to his wife.
"No, that felt more like snow to me," she replied. "No, I'm sure it was just rain, he said." Well, as these things go, they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing. Just then they saw a minor communist party official walking toward them. "Let's not fight about it," the man said, "let's ask Comrade Rudolph whether it's officially raining or snowing."
As the official approached, the man said, "Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?"
"It's raining, of course," he answered and walked on. But the woman insisted: "I know that felt like snow!" To which the man quietly replied: "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!"
***
And with that, good night. See you tomorrow.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
1. A friend of mine shared this cool idea with me. She wanted to send out Christmas cards, but couldn't make the time to address them each year. So she purchased a box of labels and handwrote each address on a label, adding embellishments and black and white stickers. Then she took them to a copy store and had the labels copied in various colors. Nifty! She also took colored pens and filled in some of the stickers. Of course, she could have used a computer program like PrintShop or PrintMaster to do this, but she liked the handwritten look.
2. You can buy blank cards at your local office supply store, print your message inside, and then paste the front of old cards as the front of the new cards. Another friend actually takes the front of the old cards and uses it as a postcard by drawing a dividing line down the middle, writing her greeting on the left, and placing the address and stamp on the right.
3. You can decorate with old cards by arranging them on your mantel or by punching holes in them and stringing them as a garland or by creating a Christmas card tree on an undecorated wall by arranging the cards in a tree shape. You can also cut old cards into gift tags for presents or cut them into interesting shapes to paste on gifts wrapped in white craft paper.
If you have a Nifty Christmas Idea, please share it with us!
2 Recipes From My Sister's Kitchen
My sister is an incredible cook. Here are two of her delicious recipes.
Mexican Quick Comfort Soup
1 can of chicken broth
1 can of chicken
1 can of chopped tomatoes & mild green chilies
2 stalks of chopped celery
1 chopped medium sweet onion
1/2 bag of baby carrots, sliced thinly
1 teaspoon of butter
1 heaping teaspoon of flour
1 small can of mushrooms
Black pepper to taste
Put a small amount of olive oil in the bottom of a heavy skillet. Turn heat up to medium. Add onions, celery, and carrots. Cook until the onions are transparent. Put in large heavy pot. Add remaining ingredients. Cover and bring to a boil.
Add one teaspoon of butter to the first skillet. Melt butter, and then add a heaping teaspoon of flour. Cook flour until it begins to change color. Drain one small can of mushrooms. Pour the liquid into the skillet. Stir until smooth. Then pour the mixture and the mushrooms into the pot.
Turn the heat down to low. Replace the lid. The chilies will increase in heat the longer they cook, but you can add a small can of chopped green chilies. This will open your sinuses! You can replace the mushroom liquid with 1/4 cup of milk and then add a two-inch block of grated Velveeta cheese to the soup with the thickened roux. Tasty!
All the Children of the World Chili
1 can of Red beans
1 can of Yellow beans (Garbanzo)
1 can of Black beans
1 can of White beans (navy)
1 can of Brown beans (pinto)
1 large can of pureed tomatoes
1 large can of diced tomatoes
1 package of mild chili seasoning
1 chopped yellow or white onion
1 1/2 lb. hamburger
Brown hamburger and add onions. Drain excess fat. Put meat and onions into crock-pot. Add all beans and tomatoes. Stir in the seasoning mix. Cook on low for at least eight hours or overnight. Yummy!
1 Christmas Joke
A Russian couple was walking down the street in St. Petersburg the other night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose. "I think it's raining," he said to his wife.
"No, that felt more like snow to me," she replied. "No, I'm sure it was just rain, he said." Well, as these things go, they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing. Just then they saw a minor communist party official walking toward them. "Let's not fight about it," the man said, "let's ask Comrade Rudolph whether it's officially raining or snowing."
As the official approached, the man said, "Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?"
"It's raining, of course," he answered and walked on. But the woman insisted: "I know that felt like snow!" To which the man quietly replied: "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!"
***
And with that, good night. See you tomorrow.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Monday, December 07, 2009
HSCC: DANGER! DANGER! DANGER!
Christmas Crafting or Danger During the Holidays!
By Stephen B. Bagley
It was a few days before Christmas last year, and I was talking to Linda on the phone. "Do you want to come over and help me with my Christmas crafts?" I asked.
"Good heavens, NO!" she shouted. "I'd rather strip naked and run through a rose garden that's been sprayed with lemon juice."
"What time will you be here?" I asked.
"I'd rather to be strapped to the speakers at a bagpipe concert," she said.
"Is that yes or no?" I asked. "I don't understand."
"You're not trying to," she said. "Rather than crafting with you, I'd sit through the presidental debates again! Sober!"
"I'm beginning to get the odd feeling that you might perhaps be reluctant," I said. "Why is that?"
"Because it's dangerous," she said. "People get hurt when you do crafts."
I sighed. "Is Adam complaining about his eyebrows again?"
"Stephen, they fell off!"
"Actually, they peeled off," I said. "And I told him not to stand over the chemicals when we were etching glass. Well, I meant to tell him."
"And about Cynthia?"
"That was an accident," I said. "I had no idea enough paint fumes had accumulated to explode. But she'll be out of the bodycast in a couple of month. Personally, I think she's enjoying the rest despite her threats and the attempts to have me snuffed."
"Yes, there's nothing more restful than having nurses turn you every hour and orderlies feed you through a straw," Linda said.
"So you'll come over?" I asked.
"Not that I'm agreeing, but what exactly are you going to be doing?"
"Just papercraft," I said. "There's nothing dangerous in papercraft. We'll be tearing up paper and mixing the pieces with water and a few chemicals, most of which aren't toxic."
"Well, I guess ... What do you mean most?! she snapped. "No, no, NO! Papercraft is out."
"We could make Christmas candles," I said. "Those make good gifts."
"Didn't you have a wax explosion a couple of months ago?" she asked.
"No one was seriously hurt, and my kitchen has already been repaired," I said. "If I could find my cat, everything would be fine. I tried to follow the smoke trail she left, but the wind was high and I lost her around Oak Street."
"No candles," she said firmly. "Don't you do wooden projects?"
I used to," I said. "But the police took away my electric saw after that regrettable incident when I was trying to help those nuns repair a pew and I sneezed."
"Oh, yeah, I forgot," she said. "Do you still get hate mail from Sister Mary Margaret?"
"Just hate postcards now," I said. "I think she's getting over her anger. I hope so. It can't be good for her spiritual growth."
"What about painting?" she suggested. "I mean, watercolor painting. Yeah, watercolors are safe. I couldn't get hurt doing watercolors."
"Okay, we'll do that," I said happily. "Come on over."
Later that night as we huddled under a blanket provided by the fire department, she glared at me. "How oh how did the watercolors catch fire?!" she asked.
"Well, I thought they looked a little thick," I said. "So I thought I'd try thinning them with alcohol."
She didn't say anything.
"I think short hair is a good look for you," I said brightly.
Fortunately they were able to pull her off me before she could finish choking me. Because she's a friend, I didn't press charges.
Copyright 2009 by Stephen B. Bagley. All rights reserved.
See you tomorrow! Hope you have a great day!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
By Stephen B. Bagley
It was a few days before Christmas last year, and I was talking to Linda on the phone. "Do you want to come over and help me with my Christmas crafts?" I asked.
"Good heavens, NO!" she shouted. "I'd rather strip naked and run through a rose garden that's been sprayed with lemon juice."
"What time will you be here?" I asked.
"I'd rather to be strapped to the speakers at a bagpipe concert," she said.
"Is that yes or no?" I asked. "I don't understand."
"You're not trying to," she said. "Rather than crafting with you, I'd sit through the presidental debates again! Sober!"
"I'm beginning to get the odd feeling that you might perhaps be reluctant," I said. "Why is that?"
"Because it's dangerous," she said. "People get hurt when you do crafts."
I sighed. "Is Adam complaining about his eyebrows again?"
"Stephen, they fell off!"
"Actually, they peeled off," I said. "And I told him not to stand over the chemicals when we were etching glass. Well, I meant to tell him."
"And about Cynthia?"
"That was an accident," I said. "I had no idea enough paint fumes had accumulated to explode. But she'll be out of the bodycast in a couple of month. Personally, I think she's enjoying the rest despite her threats and the attempts to have me snuffed."
"Yes, there's nothing more restful than having nurses turn you every hour and orderlies feed you through a straw," Linda said.
"So you'll come over?" I asked.
"Not that I'm agreeing, but what exactly are you going to be doing?"
"Just papercraft," I said. "There's nothing dangerous in papercraft. We'll be tearing up paper and mixing the pieces with water and a few chemicals, most of which aren't toxic."
"Well, I guess ... What do you mean most?! she snapped. "No, no, NO! Papercraft is out."
"We could make Christmas candles," I said. "Those make good gifts."
"Didn't you have a wax explosion a couple of months ago?" she asked.
"No one was seriously hurt, and my kitchen has already been repaired," I said. "If I could find my cat, everything would be fine. I tried to follow the smoke trail she left, but the wind was high and I lost her around Oak Street."
"No candles," she said firmly. "Don't you do wooden projects?"
I used to," I said. "But the police took away my electric saw after that regrettable incident when I was trying to help those nuns repair a pew and I sneezed."
"Oh, yeah, I forgot," she said. "Do you still get hate mail from Sister Mary Margaret?"
"Just hate postcards now," I said. "I think she's getting over her anger. I hope so. It can't be good for her spiritual growth."
"What about painting?" she suggested. "I mean, watercolor painting. Yeah, watercolors are safe. I couldn't get hurt doing watercolors."
"Okay, we'll do that," I said happily. "Come on over."
Later that night as we huddled under a blanket provided by the fire department, she glared at me. "How oh how did the watercolors catch fire?!" she asked.
"Well, I thought they looked a little thick," I said. "So I thought I'd try thinning them with alcohol."
She didn't say anything.
"I think short hair is a good look for you," I said brightly.
Fortunately they were able to pull her off me before she could finish choking me. Because she's a friend, I didn't press charges.
Copyright 2009 by Stephen B. Bagley. All rights reserved.
See you tomorrow! Hope you have a great day!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Sunday, December 06, 2009
HSCC: Music!
I attended a marvelous concert today. The local First United Church presented their Hanging of the Green. They had a bell choir, which was truly wonderful. And the choir itself simply wowed the audience. It was a wonderful time.
They touched on Carol of the Bells in a medley, but didn't perform the complete song. Here is a version from the Tuscon Boys Choir that is simply grand. (Lyrics follow.)
Carol of the Bells
Hark! how the bells, sweet silver bells
All seem to say, throw cares away.
Christmas is here, bringing good cheer
To young and old, meek and the bold
Ding, dong, ding, dong, that is their song,
With joyful ring, all caroling
One seems to hear words of good cheer
From everywhere, filling the air
O, how they pound, raising the sound
O’er hill and dale, telling their tale
Gaily they ring, while people sing
Songs of good cheer, Christmas is here!
Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas!
Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas!
On, on they send, on without end
Their joyful tone to every home
Hark! how the bells, sweet silver bells
All seem to say, throw cares away.
Christmas is here, bringing good cheer
To young and old, meek and the bold
Ding, dong, ding, dong, that is their song
With joyful ring, all caroling.
One seems to hear words of good cheer
From everywhere, filling the air
O, how they pound, raising the sound
O’er hill and dale, telling their tale
Gaily they ring, while people sing
Songs of good cheer, Christmas is here!
Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas!
Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas!
On, on they send, on without end
Their joyful tone to every home.
Ding dong ding dong
I hope you had a good Sunday and have a great day tomorrow. Talk to you then.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
They touched on Carol of the Bells in a medley, but didn't perform the complete song. Here is a version from the Tuscon Boys Choir that is simply grand. (Lyrics follow.)
Carol of the Bells
Hark! how the bells, sweet silver bells
All seem to say, throw cares away.
Christmas is here, bringing good cheer
To young and old, meek and the bold
Ding, dong, ding, dong, that is their song,
With joyful ring, all caroling
One seems to hear words of good cheer
From everywhere, filling the air
O, how they pound, raising the sound
O’er hill and dale, telling their tale
Gaily they ring, while people sing
Songs of good cheer, Christmas is here!
Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas!
Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas!
On, on they send, on without end
Their joyful tone to every home
Hark! how the bells, sweet silver bells
All seem to say, throw cares away.
Christmas is here, bringing good cheer
To young and old, meek and the bold
Ding, dong, ding, dong, that is their song
With joyful ring, all caroling.
One seems to hear words of good cheer
From everywhere, filling the air
O, how they pound, raising the sound
O’er hill and dale, telling their tale
Gaily they ring, while people sing
Songs of good cheer, Christmas is here!
Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas!
Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas!
On, on they send, on without end
Their joyful tone to every home.
Ding dong ding dong
I hope you had a good Sunday and have a great day tomorrow. Talk to you then.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Saturday, December 05, 2009
HSCC: Joke & Recipes
A Christmas Joke
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. St. Peter said, "In honor of the season, you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."
The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said.
"You may pass through the pearly gates," St. Peter said.
The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells."
St. Peter said, "You may pass through the pearly gates."
The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties.
St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"
The man replied, "These are Carol's."
Michelle's Recipes
Michelle posted these delicious recipes in the 2006 HSCC. They're tasty enough to share again!
Sorry to be posting so late, but it's been a busy day. A good day, but a busy one. I hope your day was good, also. Anyway, I'm watching The Revenge of the Fallen and want to concentrate on that. Talk to you tomorrow.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. St. Peter said, "In honor of the season, you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."
The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said.
"You may pass through the pearly gates," St. Peter said.
The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells."
St. Peter said, "You may pass through the pearly gates."
The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties.
St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"
The man replied, "These are Carol's."
Michelle's Recipes
Michelle posted these delicious recipes in the 2006 HSCC. They're tasty enough to share again!
Potato Cheese Soup***
5 lbs Potatoes peeled, washed and cubed
1 white Onion chopped
1/2 stick of butter
Milk
White pepper and salt to taste
Chicken bouillon to taste (I usually use 2 large cubes)
4-8 oz Velveeta (depending on how cheesy you want it)
Cheddar cheese
Parmesan
Saute onion in butter until transparent. Fill pot with potatoes and water just to cover. Add sauted onion, salt and pepper and bouillon. Bring to a boil and let simmer until potatoes are tender. Add Milk until broth looks creamy. Simmer for another ten minutes. Add Velveeta and Parmesan until melted. Add cheddar before serving (so as not to curdle the cheese). Serve with some fresh baked bread and a salad. Yum!
Snickerdoodles
This recipe says it makes 4 dozen but I usually get about 6 dozen.
1 1/2 cups sugar
1 stick margarine or butter
1/2 cup shortening
2 large eggs
2 1/2 cups flour
2 ts cream of tartar
1 ts baking soda
1/4 ts salt
cinnamon/sugar mixture (set aside)
1/4 cup sugar
2 teaspoons cinnamon
Heat oven to 400. Cream butter, eggs, shortening and sugar. Add flour, cream of tartar, salt and baking soda to form dough. Roll into 1 inch balls and roll in the cinnamon sugar mixture to coat. Bake 8-10 minutes. I usually under-cook them a little to keep them softer longer. I like my cookies chewy.
Refrigerator Fudge
If you aren't into candy baking like me, then this is a great way to get creamy fudge in just a couple easy peasy steps.
2 pkgs semi sweet chocolate chips
2 cans sweetened condensed milk
Mix both ingredient in a microwaveable bowl. Microwave in 3 minute increments to ensure that you don't scorch the mixture. Once it is thoroughly melted and mixed, pour into a glass baking dish (greased with cocoa powder to prevent sticking) and put in the fridge. In a couple hours, you have rich and creamy fudge.
You can sprinkle the top with crushed candy canes, nuts or broken up candy bars to make it look festive.
Sorry to be posting so late, but it's been a busy day. A good day, but a busy one. I hope your day was good, also. Anyway, I'm watching The Revenge of the Fallen and want to concentrate on that. Talk to you tomorrow.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Friday, December 04, 2009
HSCC: Poor Christmas
Poor Christmas. It doesn’t stand a chance. All the pressure people put on it. New Year’s Eve is about starting over; no one expects anything from it except maybe a kiss at midnight. But Christmas is expected to redeem the year. To make better everything that passed before it, to rewrite our failures and sorrows, and to make all of the setbacks worthwhile.
Poor Christmas. The odds are against it. It has evolved into a shopping frenzy. Retailers place their hopes on Christmas sales each year. “We can get back into the black if the man in red shakes loose enough green.” Not that people don’t notice. There will be at least a million people blogging, preaching, griping, nagging, complaining about how commercial Christmas has become. People will proudly not celebrate it because they want to show their disapproval of this overwhelming greed.
Or maybe they’re not celebrating Christmas because they’re showing their disapproval of Christianity. They will bring up the Crusades and religious wars and The Inquisition or how the religious people disapprove of their particular affection for Volkswagens. Not that the ultra-religious don’t attack Christmas, too, because it is based on a pagan holiday, you know, and the Christmas Tree actually is an instrument of the Beast Below and you don't want to know what a garland really means.
And let’s not forget how Nativity Scenes offend some people. In fact, the offended parties must often sue for millions of dollars because seeing just one Nativity Scene damages their psychological well-being to the point they can’t function and have suicidal thoughts, although sadly they never follow through.
Who doesn’t hate Christmas with its get-togethers and parties and all those presents people give us that are just wrong, wrong, wrong and obviously they don’t really know us and don’t care what we like and now we have to return them or re-gift them or finally throw them out with all the other trash? You’d have to be a fool to like this miserable holiday and all those boring, long elementary school programs it inspires. And there’s the endless, sappy, sad, stupid TV specials and movies where little Jo is dying, but the Prancer delivers the life-saving drug just in time for Romeo and Juliet to finally tie the knot and honeymoon in Paris.
Let’s be honest. We’re angry at Christmas. At the miracles never delivered. The presents Santa never brought. The people who leave us or pass away at the holidays. We don’t like our families. We don’t like our lives. We want something better, and we want it at Christmas, and it better deliver or else.
Poor Christmas. You could write a book -- and hundreds have -- about how Christmas became what it is and how it needs to change and why we’re so severely disappointed in it. And it takes the abuse because it must, although wouldn’t it be cool if one day Santa started packing heat? Or maybe those Wise Men would show how wise they really are and file a class action suit against humanity for our inability to grow up?
Christmas is what it is. It offers presents, trees, elves, Wise Men, stars, sales, family, tinsel, mangers, lights, decorations, food, and much, much more. We turn our noses up at it. It isn’t exactly what we want so we refuse everything because we want it our way or the highway. I don’t know why it comes back year after year.
But it does. Right before the changing of the year, it returns. It offers its gifts again and again and again. Unlike all the other holidays, Christmas tries. It attempts to bring out the best of us -- and does in soup kitchens and food pantries, with Meals on Wheels and Toys for Tots. Christmas has hope. Kinda silly really to keep believing after all these years that humanity is still worth it when so much evidence points otherwise, but Christmas refuses to learn better. It keeps offering a message of good will and good cheer, as tired and hokey as that is to our modern ears.
You gotta admire its sheer stubbornness. It keeps going. Year after year. Eggnog and fruitcake sustain it in ways science can’t understand. Every year it makes the trek to Bethlehem to a stable carved out of a hillside where a virgin gives birth to a king. All the smart people say it’s a fable or parable or who knows what, but Christmas doesn’t care. Christmas is only interested in that first miracle, the beginning, the chance for the world to start over, the beginning of what was to come.
Always when I think of Christmas, I think of that moment. That expectancy before the event. When the world held its breath. Shepherds and wise men would come later as would angel choruses and a thousand other changes as time advanced, but not yet. In that moment, there is only a young frightened man holding the hand of a young frightened woman in a stable in an insignificant village.
The animals rustle in the darkness.
The air is cold.
The sky is clear.
A star is giving forth a river of light.
Then there is the cry of a babe.
And it all begins again.
Believe what you will. Make of Christmas what you would. Make everything meaningless if you can. But I won't join you. I never will. If you look for me, this is where you'll find me: kneeling at that manger. And if you'd like to give me a gift this Christmas, join me. We'll sit in the silence of the cold, clear night and listen for the sound of new life.
Copyright 2009 by Stephen B. Bagley. All rights reserved.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Poor Christmas. The odds are against it. It has evolved into a shopping frenzy. Retailers place their hopes on Christmas sales each year. “We can get back into the black if the man in red shakes loose enough green.” Not that people don’t notice. There will be at least a million people blogging, preaching, griping, nagging, complaining about how commercial Christmas has become. People will proudly not celebrate it because they want to show their disapproval of this overwhelming greed.
Or maybe they’re not celebrating Christmas because they’re showing their disapproval of Christianity. They will bring up the Crusades and religious wars and The Inquisition or how the religious people disapprove of their particular affection for Volkswagens. Not that the ultra-religious don’t attack Christmas, too, because it is based on a pagan holiday, you know, and the Christmas Tree actually is an instrument of the Beast Below and you don't want to know what a garland really means.
And let’s not forget how Nativity Scenes offend some people. In fact, the offended parties must often sue for millions of dollars because seeing just one Nativity Scene damages their psychological well-being to the point they can’t function and have suicidal thoughts, although sadly they never follow through.
Who doesn’t hate Christmas with its get-togethers and parties and all those presents people give us that are just wrong, wrong, wrong and obviously they don’t really know us and don’t care what we like and now we have to return them or re-gift them or finally throw them out with all the other trash? You’d have to be a fool to like this miserable holiday and all those boring, long elementary school programs it inspires. And there’s the endless, sappy, sad, stupid TV specials and movies where little Jo is dying, but the Prancer delivers the life-saving drug just in time for Romeo and Juliet to finally tie the knot and honeymoon in Paris.
Let’s be honest. We’re angry at Christmas. At the miracles never delivered. The presents Santa never brought. The people who leave us or pass away at the holidays. We don’t like our families. We don’t like our lives. We want something better, and we want it at Christmas, and it better deliver or else.
Poor Christmas. You could write a book -- and hundreds have -- about how Christmas became what it is and how it needs to change and why we’re so severely disappointed in it. And it takes the abuse because it must, although wouldn’t it be cool if one day Santa started packing heat? Or maybe those Wise Men would show how wise they really are and file a class action suit against humanity for our inability to grow up?
Christmas is what it is. It offers presents, trees, elves, Wise Men, stars, sales, family, tinsel, mangers, lights, decorations, food, and much, much more. We turn our noses up at it. It isn’t exactly what we want so we refuse everything because we want it our way or the highway. I don’t know why it comes back year after year.
But it does. Right before the changing of the year, it returns. It offers its gifts again and again and again. Unlike all the other holidays, Christmas tries. It attempts to bring out the best of us -- and does in soup kitchens and food pantries, with Meals on Wheels and Toys for Tots. Christmas has hope. Kinda silly really to keep believing after all these years that humanity is still worth it when so much evidence points otherwise, but Christmas refuses to learn better. It keeps offering a message of good will and good cheer, as tired and hokey as that is to our modern ears.
You gotta admire its sheer stubbornness. It keeps going. Year after year. Eggnog and fruitcake sustain it in ways science can’t understand. Every year it makes the trek to Bethlehem to a stable carved out of a hillside where a virgin gives birth to a king. All the smart people say it’s a fable or parable or who knows what, but Christmas doesn’t care. Christmas is only interested in that first miracle, the beginning, the chance for the world to start over, the beginning of what was to come.
Always when I think of Christmas, I think of that moment. That expectancy before the event. When the world held its breath. Shepherds and wise men would come later as would angel choruses and a thousand other changes as time advanced, but not yet. In that moment, there is only a young frightened man holding the hand of a young frightened woman in a stable in an insignificant village.
The animals rustle in the darkness.
The air is cold.
The sky is clear.
A star is giving forth a river of light.
Then there is the cry of a babe.
And it all begins again.
Believe what you will. Make of Christmas what you would. Make everything meaningless if you can. But I won't join you. I never will. If you look for me, this is where you'll find me: kneeling at that manger. And if you'd like to give me a gift this Christmas, join me. We'll sit in the silence of the cold, clear night and listen for the sound of new life.
Copyright 2009 by Stephen B. Bagley. All rights reserved.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Thursday, December 03, 2009
HSCC: The Twelve Days of Christmas
Welcome back to HSCC 2009. What follows is a piece that made the email rounds a few years ago. I wish I had written it! Enjoy!
The Twelve Days of Christmas
December 14, 2009
Dearest Dave,
I went to the door today, and the postman delivered a partridge in a pear tree. This was a delightful gift! I couldn't have been more surprised or pleased darling!
With truly the deepest love,
Agnes
December 15, 2009
Dearest Dave,
Today the postman brought me yet another of your sweet gifts. The two turtle doves that arrived today are adorable, and I'm delighted by your thoughtful and generous ways.
With all of my love,
Your Agnes
December 16, 2009
Dearest Dave,
You've truly been too kind! I must protest; I don't deserve such generosity. The thought of getting three French hens amazes me. Yet, I am not surprised -- what more should I expect from such a nice person.
Love,
Agnes
December 17, 2009
Dear Dave,
Four calling birds arrived in the mail today. They are truly nice but don't you think that enough is enough? You are being too romantic.
Affectionately,
Agnes
December 18, 2009
Dearest darling Dave,
It was a surprise to get five golden rings! I now have one for every finger. You truly are impossible darling, yet oh how I love it! Quite frankly, all of those squawking birds from the previous days were starting to get on my nerves. Yet, you managed to come through with a beautiful valuable gift!
All my love,
Agnes
December 19, 2009
Dear Dave,
When I opened my door, there were actually six geese a-laying on my front steps. So you're back to the birds again, huh? Those geese are dear, but where will I keep them? The neighbors are complaining, and I am unable to sleep with all the racket. Please stop dear.
Cordially,
Agnes
December 20, 2009
Dave,
What is with you and those stupid birds!? Seven swans a-swimming! What kind of sick joke is this!? There are bird droppings everywhere! They never shut up, and I don't get any sleep! I'm a nervous wreck! It's not funny you weirdo, so stop with the birds.
Sincerely,
Agnes
December 21, 2009
O.K. wise guy,
The birds were bad enough. Now what do you expect me to do with eight maids a-milking? If that's not bad enough, they had to bring their cows! The front lawn was completely ruined by them, and I can't move in my own house! Just lay off me or you'll be sorry!
Agnes
December 22, 2009
Hey loser,
What are you? You must be some kind of sadist. Now there are nine pipers playing, and they certainly do play. They haven't stopped chasing those maids since they got here! The cows are getting upset, and they're stepping all over those screeching birds. The neighbors are getting up a petition to evict me, and I'm going out of my mind!
You'll get yours!
Agnes
December 23, 2009
You rotten scum,
There are now ten ladies dancing! There is only one problem with that! They're dancing twenty-four hours a day all around me with the pipers upsetting the cows and the maids. The cows can't sleep, and they are going to the bathroom everywhere! The building commissioner has subpoenaed me to give cause as to why the house shouldn't be condemned! I can't even think of a reason! You creep! I'm sending the police after you!
One who means it!
December 24, 2009
Listen you evil, sadistic, maniac!
What's with the eleven lords-a-leaping?!? They are leaping across the rooms breaking everything and even injuring some of the maids! The place smells, is an absolute mad house, and is about to be condemned! At least the birds are quiet; they were trampled to death by the cows. I hope you are satisfied -- you rotten vicious worthless piece of garbage!
Your sworn enemy,
Agnes
December 25, 2009
The Law Offices of
Badger, Rees, and Yorker
20 Knave Street
Chicago, Illinois
Dear Sir,
This is to acknowledge your latest gift of twelve fiddlers-fiddling which you have seen fit to inflict on our client, one Agnes McHolstein. The destruction of course was total. If you attempt to reach Ms. Mcholstein at Happy Daze Sanatorium, the attendants have instructions to shoot you on sight.
Please direct all correspondence to this office in the future. With this letter, please find attached a summons for you to appear in court and answer these charges.
Cordially,
Badger, Rees, and Yorker
***
Blood sugar is holding its own. I'm past the first week of great results and have entered the slow results. I'm hitting in the middle 100s. I hope by January to be in the low 100s and then maybe by February in the 90s. Wouldn't that be cool!
A new blog for you to check out by EJ, who is a commenter on my Facebook and here. It's EJ's Ramblings. It's address is dragonsroost.blogspot.com. I'm so jealous of her cool web address!
Very cold here. We had rain yesterday, but no snow and the skies are mostly clear. Today is the town's Parade of Lights. I'm intending to go to it, but it's so cold I might change my mind. I no like cold.
Christmas tree is up, Christmas village is up, house is fairly clean. Next project is to complete the December family newsletter this week and complete my Christmas cards. Then next week is Christmas shopping until it's done!
And now it's time to start another day. I hope yours goes well. Be talking with you tomorrow as the HSCC continues!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
The Twelve Days of Christmas
December 14, 2009
Dearest Dave,
I went to the door today, and the postman delivered a partridge in a pear tree. This was a delightful gift! I couldn't have been more surprised or pleased darling!
With truly the deepest love,
Agnes
December 15, 2009
Dearest Dave,
Today the postman brought me yet another of your sweet gifts. The two turtle doves that arrived today are adorable, and I'm delighted by your thoughtful and generous ways.
With all of my love,
Your Agnes
December 16, 2009
Dearest Dave,
You've truly been too kind! I must protest; I don't deserve such generosity. The thought of getting three French hens amazes me. Yet, I am not surprised -- what more should I expect from such a nice person.
Love,
Agnes
December 17, 2009
Dear Dave,
Four calling birds arrived in the mail today. They are truly nice but don't you think that enough is enough? You are being too romantic.
Affectionately,
Agnes
December 18, 2009
Dearest darling Dave,
It was a surprise to get five golden rings! I now have one for every finger. You truly are impossible darling, yet oh how I love it! Quite frankly, all of those squawking birds from the previous days were starting to get on my nerves. Yet, you managed to come through with a beautiful valuable gift!
All my love,
Agnes
December 19, 2009
Dear Dave,
When I opened my door, there were actually six geese a-laying on my front steps. So you're back to the birds again, huh? Those geese are dear, but where will I keep them? The neighbors are complaining, and I am unable to sleep with all the racket. Please stop dear.
Cordially,
Agnes
December 20, 2009
Dave,
What is with you and those stupid birds!? Seven swans a-swimming! What kind of sick joke is this!? There are bird droppings everywhere! They never shut up, and I don't get any sleep! I'm a nervous wreck! It's not funny you weirdo, so stop with the birds.
Sincerely,
Agnes
December 21, 2009
O.K. wise guy,
The birds were bad enough. Now what do you expect me to do with eight maids a-milking? If that's not bad enough, they had to bring their cows! The front lawn was completely ruined by them, and I can't move in my own house! Just lay off me or you'll be sorry!
Agnes
December 22, 2009
Hey loser,
What are you? You must be some kind of sadist. Now there are nine pipers playing, and they certainly do play. They haven't stopped chasing those maids since they got here! The cows are getting upset, and they're stepping all over those screeching birds. The neighbors are getting up a petition to evict me, and I'm going out of my mind!
You'll get yours!
Agnes
December 23, 2009
You rotten scum,
There are now ten ladies dancing! There is only one problem with that! They're dancing twenty-four hours a day all around me with the pipers upsetting the cows and the maids. The cows can't sleep, and they are going to the bathroom everywhere! The building commissioner has subpoenaed me to give cause as to why the house shouldn't be condemned! I can't even think of a reason! You creep! I'm sending the police after you!
One who means it!
December 24, 2009
Listen you evil, sadistic, maniac!
What's with the eleven lords-a-leaping?!? They are leaping across the rooms breaking everything and even injuring some of the maids! The place smells, is an absolute mad house, and is about to be condemned! At least the birds are quiet; they were trampled to death by the cows. I hope you are satisfied -- you rotten vicious worthless piece of garbage!
Your sworn enemy,
Agnes
December 25, 2009
The Law Offices of
Badger, Rees, and Yorker
20 Knave Street
Chicago, Illinois
Dear Sir,
This is to acknowledge your latest gift of twelve fiddlers-fiddling which you have seen fit to inflict on our client, one Agnes McHolstein. The destruction of course was total. If you attempt to reach Ms. Mcholstein at Happy Daze Sanatorium, the attendants have instructions to shoot you on sight.
Please direct all correspondence to this office in the future. With this letter, please find attached a summons for you to appear in court and answer these charges.
Cordially,
Badger, Rees, and Yorker
***
Blood sugar is holding its own. I'm past the first week of great results and have entered the slow results. I'm hitting in the middle 100s. I hope by January to be in the low 100s and then maybe by February in the 90s. Wouldn't that be cool!
A new blog for you to check out by EJ, who is a commenter on my Facebook and here. It's EJ's Ramblings. It's address is dragonsroost.blogspot.com. I'm so jealous of her cool web address!
Very cold here. We had rain yesterday, but no snow and the skies are mostly clear. Today is the town's Parade of Lights. I'm intending to go to it, but it's so cold I might change my mind. I no like cold.
Christmas tree is up, Christmas village is up, house is fairly clean. Next project is to complete the December family newsletter this week and complete my Christmas cards. Then next week is Christmas shopping until it's done!
And now it's time to start another day. I hope yours goes well. Be talking with you tomorrow as the HSCC continues!
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Tuesday, December 01, 2009
HSCC Starts Now!
Welcome!
It's the first day of the Harbor Street Christmas Celebration! Aren't you excited? We have a full 25 days of humor, recipes, stories, photos, and lots more. And remember there's always room for your contributions!
Let's start with a few Christmas Facts (Some of Which Might be True)
Christmas Facts (Some Of Which Might Be True)
By Stephen B. Bagley
Kissing under the mistletoe dates back to a 17th century English kissing game. Back then, a berry was removed from the mistletoe every time a kiss was made, which meant no more kisses when all the berries were gone, and then everyone would just laugh and laugh. Yeah, I know, but you have to remember that they didn't have TV so they had to fill their time as best they could. Mistletoe, by the way, was used by the druids in their secret ceremonies. The druids, a cheery group, used to place mistletoe wreaths around the necks of their victims before the victims were sacrificed by having their entrails nailed to an oak tree. You don't see that on a lot of Christmas cards, do you?
Christmas trees started in Germany in the 16th century. On Christmas Eve, Martin Luther was walking home under a starry sky, which was so beautiful that he wanted to recreate its beauty for his children. He decorated a large evergreen with lit candles. He followed his creation of the First Christmas Tree with the development of the First House Fire Caused By A Christmas Tree.
Since 1947, the people of Oslo, Norway, have given a Christmas tree every year to the city of Westminster, England. The gift expresses Norway's gratitude for Britain's help during World War II, despite the fact that the tree is never on Britain's Christmas list. Britain would prefer a gift card.
The first president to decorate the white house Christmas tree in the United States was Franklin Pierce. This is the only notable thing Pierce did while in office and as such should be remembered, but not by me. I've already cleansed it from my memory.
Traditionally, Christmas trees are taken down after Epiphany or whenever the husband has been nagged beyond endurance.
"The Nutcracker" is the most famous Christmas ballet and was used by the Chinese to break the wills of political prisoners. It is outlawed by the Geneva Convention as is the playing of "Jingle Bells" more than 1,754,322 times during the holiday season.
If you received all of the gifts in the song "The Twelve Days of Christmas," you would receive 364 presents, none of which you could return. By the way, why are there so many birds in that song? Doesn't it seem rather fowl?
Holly berries are poisonous, which does explain why holly berry cookies aren't popular even though there was a heavy marketing push for them during the 1950s. It joined the ranks of other failed food products: stone ground hemlock bread, foxglove fajitas, poop pie, and of course, green tea.
In 1843, "A Christmas Carol" was written by Charles Dickens in just six weeks. Many of us feel he should have taken more time with it and added some spaceships and several hot alien females.
The first state to recognize the Christmas holiday officially was Alabama. Afterwards, Alabama had to lie down and wasn't able to recognize other things for years, which is one of the reasons they lagged so far behind in civil rights.
Christmas became a national holiday in America on June 26, 1870. When the news was announced, many retailers swooned.
Coca Cola was the first beverage company to use Santa for a winter promotion. This would be the beginning of a lucrative career as Santa signed endorsement contracts for all sorts of products, including gardening tools (Hoe, Hoe, Hoe!), pies (Whole, Whole, Whole!), dynamite (Hole, Hole, Hole!), and even laser removal of facial disfigurements (Mole, Mole, Mole!). And no, we're not going to do a Viagra joke here, although it's hard to resist.
The government actually banned a Christmas tree decoration. Tinsel was once made of lead. (It's now made of plastic.) The tinsel maker's jingle of "Decorate your tree with a silver rain; You'll be happy as you damage your brain" was remade into a hip-hop hit in the 90s.
"Rudolph" was created by Montgomery Ward in the late 1930's for a holiday promotion. The rest is sheer greed and marketing history.
The Christmas card was started in England in 1843. Louis Prang, a Massachusetts printer, printed the first Christmas card in the United States in 1875. There’s more to the story, but I got bored. Feel free to look it up. Merry Christmas!
Copyright 2009 by Stephen B. Bagley. All rights reserved.
And now here's a quick and delicious recipe from my sister.
Microwave Fudge
1 lb. box of powdered sugar
1/2 cup of cocoa
1 stick of butter
1/4 cup of milk
1/2 cup of chopped pecans or crushed peppermint and 1/2 teaspoon peppermint flavoring
1 teaspoon of vanilla
Prepare an eight inch square pan by lining with foil and then buttering the foil. In a microwaveable container, mix the sugar and cocoa. Place butter on top of the powdered sugar/cocoa mix. Pour in milk. Microwave on high for two minutes or until the butter is melted. Stir and mix well. This mixing process will take a few minutes. When it begins to thicken, add chopped pecans and vanilla. (This recipe can be adapted using crushed peppermint instead of nuts and adding 1/2 teaspoon of peppermint flavoring.) Pour mixture into pan and let harden.
And finally, how to say Merry Christmas in more languages than you will ever need!
Afrikaner: Een Plesierige Kerfees
Argentinian: Felces Pasquas y felices Ano Nuevo
Arkansas: All y'alls have a mary Christmas ya hear
Armenian: Schernorhavor Dzenount
Bohemain: Vesele Vanoce
Bulgarian: Chestita Koleda
Chinese: Kung Hsi Hsin Niene bing Chu Shen Tan
Computer: 01001101 01000101 01010010 01010010 01011001 01000011 01001000 01010010 01001001 01010011 01010100 01001101 01000001 01010011
Croatian: Sretan Bozic
Danish: Glaedelig Jul
England: Cherrio! Hav'a cuppa, goven'r! Happy yules
Esperanto: Gajan Kristnaskon
Estonian: Roomsaid Joulu Puhi
Finnish: Houska Joulua
Flemish: Vrolike Kerstmis
French: Joyeux Noel
German: Froehliche Weihnachten
Gore: Christmas lights contribute to global warming so turn them off and have a dim Christmas
Greek: Kala Christougena
Dutch: Vrolyk Kerfeest en Gelukkig Nieuw Jaar
Hungarian: Kellemes Karacsonyi unnepeket
Iraqian: Idah Saidan Wa Sanah Jadidah
Irish: Nodlaig mhaith chugnat
Italian: Buon Natale
Japanese: Meri Kurisumasu
Jugoslavian: Cestitamo Bozic
Klingon: (Nothing because they’re not real. They’re fictional. The Federation doesn’t exist. Get a life.)
Lettish: Priecigus Ziemassvetkus
Lithuanian: Linksmu Kaledu
New York: Shut up and get out of my way, you jingle bell freak
Norwegian: God Jul og Godt Nytt Aar
Oklahoman: Merry Christmas, y'all
Polish: Boze Narodzenie
Portuguese: Boas Festas y Feliz Ano Novo
Ridiculously inoffensive: Happy non-specific occasion
Rumanian: Sarbatori vesele
Russian: S Rozhdestvom Kristovym
Serbian: Hristos se rodi
Slovakian: Vesele vianoce
Spanish: Feliz Navidad
Swedish: God Jul
Texan: Merry Thankgivin'
Turkish: Noeliniz Ve Yeni Yiliniz Kutlu Olsun
Ukrainian: Chrystos Rozdzajetsia Slawyte Jeho
Welsh: Nadolig Llawen
And that will close our first day of HSCC! We'll be back tomorrow. See you then, and have a great day.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Amazon.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Barnes & Noble.com
Order Murder by the Acre in softcover from Lulu.com.
Order Murder by the Acre in hardcover only at from Lulu.com.
Order MBTA & MBDD items and more at Oakleaf
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)