Trust

      You could fill several books with my sins. Maybe some biographer will someday. But one that I haven't done is cheat in a relationship. One of my blogging friends is going through that now. I don't know all the details and probably never will since I don't know her in real life, but I do know she's hurting. Her significant other has strayed and more than once.
      I hope you know by now that I try to be a compassionate person. I want people to forgive me so I try to forgive them. But there's something about someone who cheats on their spouse or lover ... I don't trust them.
      I have friends who have cheated on their loved ones. I know this about them. I'm friends with them still, but always in the back of my mind, there's a place where I hold myself separate from them. In that place, a small voice says, "If he/she will cheat on the person they love the most, if that person will lie to their supposedly soulmate, whatever makes you think that they won't lie to you?"
      I know people make mistakes. I know that we all slip. I'm certainly not perfect. That it's not a sin that I've committed ... Well, maybe I've never been tempted enough, maybe there is somewhere a savage passion that would overwhelm me. But not so far.
      Some people have beauty and raw animal power going for them. They stride through the world and they take what they want, regardless what it does to those around them. They're stars and they're dark and dangerous and a lot of people love them and want them.
      Me -- I'm the one of the ones who remain. I'm that one with staying power, who stays loyal, who hangs on, who cleans up after the storm. I try to fix things instead of breaking them. It's not sexy, but it's real. It's what I think a man is supposed to be.
      And I don't know much about being a man. I stumble around a lot avoiding old mistakes but finding new ones. However I do know this: A man is only worth as much as his word is. If he's untrustworthy, then what do you have?
      I realize that at this point, a lot of people will say, "Yeah, but our marriage/relationship/whatever was already dead" or "It was just one night" or "It was just sex" or those thousand other excuses that we tell ourselves when we choose to do the wrong thing, when we want something we shouldn't have and frankly don't love our mates enough to deny ourselves. Perhaps those excuses are enough for some of us. But we know better. Our lips may speak lies, but our hearts know the truth.
      I hope things work out for my blogging friend. I think, from what I can read of her from reading her words, that she's strong and that ultimately she will come out okay. But that journey is going to be rough. So I guess I'll end this with a prayer for her and for all those others out there in the wilds of broken love: May God keep you, bless you and bring you finally safely home.