Mother's Day

I warn you. This is a harsh post for Mother's Day. Feel free to skip it.

Even though this is Mother's Day, I've been reminded during a phone call with a friend that some mothers are bad to their children. I was blessed with my mother who made her children a priority in her life. My prayers and thoughts are with those children who are not and were not as fortunate as I was. If you're a mother who loves her children more than herself, then may God bless you and reward you richly. He is proud of you. If you're not, then I promise you that there will be a harvest of sadness and sorrow that you will reap. If you mistreat your children when they are young, you will not be their friend or even loved when they are adults. Why would you expect them to act otherwise? 

Everyone seems familiar with "honor thy father and mother," but are you as familiar with Ephesians 6:4? It starts: "And, ye fathers." This is directly addressed to parents and then gives two duties that parents must do for their children. 

First duty: "Provoke not your children to wrath." Passionate and unreasonable rebukes, intemperate language, broken promises, neglect, or cruel usage will cause resentment on the part of your children. The Bible doesn't say that you can justify such behaviors. In fact, it's quite plain: You have a duty as a parent to "provoke not your children to wrath." No ifs, ands, or buts about it. If you mistreat your child, God will not bless you. This doesn't mean there shouldn't be correction, but that you are to remember that your children are precious and to cherish them.

Second duty: "But bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord." The Revised Version reads: "Nurture them in the chastening and admonition of the Lord." Training and restraining as well as admonition are implied. I see many parents who don't bring their children up in church and don't provide any other moral instruction, and then they are seemingly amazed when their children take drugs or steal. Yes, children have free agency, but they will do as you have trained them to do. If you cuss, cheat on your taxes, lie, behave badly, take drugs, or drink to excess, then your children will do as you do and not as you say.

It seems that some parents base their love on conditions. I love you if "you make good grades," "you clean your room," "you excel in sports," and so on. Some parents try to make children into their slaves or their clones. Those parents are breaking their children's hearts. And they are committing sin. They should remember God's example: although He expects and requires certain behaviors from us, He always loves us. There are no limits on His forgiveness.

I've been talking with a friend whose parents were alcoholics and drug users when he was young. There were many times when he and his brother didn't know if they would get breakfast or supper, but thank God for a federal program that saw to it that they would get lunch. Now his mother—who doesn't drink or take drugs anymore but still has a terrible temper—thinks he should allow her to live with them. But he won't do it. He remembers those early days, and he doesn't want her around his children. He's seeing to it that she's being taken care of properly, but his first duty is to his children. She sowed a crop of neglect and cruelty—she never spoke to him without a scream when he was young—and now she is reaping the harvest.

This is a harsh post for Mother's Day, but my loving mother never minced words. She called out evil when she saw it, and I think she would like this post. Children are precious and they grow up. Cherish them while you can. Love them while you can. Because if you wait, it will turn out to be too late.