tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-63016132024-03-07T17:25:08.821-06:0051313 Harbor StreetUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger3172125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-8886206937251839062024-02-08T15:04:00.000-06:002024-02-08T15:04:02.319-06:00February Floozy For You!<p style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="color: red;"> H<span data-offset-key="1tpnb-1-0" face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; font-size: 15px; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span data-text="true" style="font-family: inherit;">ere is your February Floozy!</span></span></span></b></p><p style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2bDwCyo6xN3xvfaFdIvKuzNCN-czpmFlO94ND0pHzbfvvuGIGbuY0Id0NVg7ZqxOh3IWIET7AYS-_tgWu5mcFHvj15_LojOit-k0hwv2fxBIbd6U52qGl40SAW28mmNQL_SA5b-4HcDxU4dJWYrLh6lZvBa1A2jBiD8zcXfvQTjRjEFFTRc3O/s1200/BookBrushImage327.png" style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15px; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><img border="0" data-original-height="628" data-original-width="1200" height="209" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2bDwCyo6xN3xvfaFdIvKuzNCN-czpmFlO94ND0pHzbfvvuGIGbuY0Id0NVg7ZqxOh3IWIET7AYS-_tgWu5mcFHvj15_LojOit-k0hwv2fxBIbd6U52qGl40SAW28mmNQL_SA5b-4HcDxU4dJWYrLh6lZvBa1A2jBiD8zcXfvQTjRjEFFTRc3O/w400-h209/BookBrushImage327.png" width="400" /></a></p><span data-offset-key="1tpnb-1-0" face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span data-text="true" style="font-family: inherit;"><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Floozy-Goes-Forth-Stephen-Bagley/dp/1312050640/" style="font-family: inherit;">Buy <i>Floozy Goes Forth</i> at Amazon</a></div></span></span><span data-offset-key="1tpnb-3-0" face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505;"><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.booksamillion.com/product/9781312050648" style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 15px; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Buy <i>Floozy Goes Forth</i> at BooksAMillion</a></div></span><span data-offset-key="1tpnb-5-0" face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505;"><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.lulu.com/shop/stephen-b-bagley/floozy-goes-forth/paperback/product-zm5ygdk.html" style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 15px; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Buy <i>Floozy Goes Forth</i> at Lulu</a></div></span><span data-offset-key="1tpnb-7-0" face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505;"><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.thriftbooks.com/w/floozy-goes-forth_stephen-b-bagley/52034295/#edition=70752275&idiq=63094415" style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 15px; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Buy <i>Floozy Goes Forth</i> at Thrift Books</a></div></span><span data-offset-key="1tpnb-9-0" face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505;"><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.walmart.com/ip/Floozy-Goes-Forth-Paperback-9781312050648/5358657767" style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 15px; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Buy <i>Floozy Goes Forth</i> at Walmart</a></div></span><span data-offset-key="1tpnb-11-0" face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505;"><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://wordery.com/floozy-goes-forth-bagley-9781312050648" style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 15px; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Buy <i>Floozy Goes Forth</i> at Wordery</a></div></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-67880006735480348352023-11-10T10:48:00.004-06:002023-11-10T10:55:15.115-06:00Here it is!<p> <span data-offset-key="d3hd4-0-0" face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span data-text="true" style="font-family: inherit;">The tease is over! Here's the cover of the forthcoming </span></span><span data-offset-key="d3hd4-0-1" face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span data-text="true" style="font-family: inherit;"><i>Floozy Goes Forth</i> in all its glory</span></span><span data-offset-key="d3hd4-0-2" face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span data-text="true" style="font-family: inherit;">!
</span></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuesFOw0OS92QZUzEdF5QQgW-HBnlVOWNH5qDOuMVY_gEJx3H1YAwFMEcRK3ShuOuFmDEfbB6tHVuU9woxBkDcy1aVu93mysOsraSwWws8DQJ-KidbjPpkJkTk5Hn8jpwQPVrLQsKMNzG3KKqYGaw9PiFtE3Z0NgqEkTzXpRPlYPd4m8glnlSb/s1128/BookBrushImage1368.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1128" data-original-width="726" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuesFOw0OS92QZUzEdF5QQgW-HBnlVOWNH5qDOuMVY_gEJx3H1YAwFMEcRK3ShuOuFmDEfbB6tHVuU9woxBkDcy1aVu93mysOsraSwWws8DQJ-KidbjPpkJkTk5Hn8jpwQPVrLQsKMNzG3KKqYGaw9PiFtE3Z0NgqEkTzXpRPlYPd4m8glnlSb/w258-h400/BookBrushImage1368.png" width="258" /></a></div><br />
<p></p><span data-offset-key="d3hd4-0-2" face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span data-text="true" style="font-family: inherit;">
</span></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-56963962788940425632023-10-27T17:42:00.003-05:002023-10-27T17:42:30.931-05:00Another cover tease!<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiO49_Ok08yqvqiibiWmXp-SAcYNWV0kw1DYP6zUo0pV9r3iOr-8bhtx7MFygssdh0pxcwZKB8IY1XqmjdOuumgUYiBM0vw9UdPMDOYK6jFRQLuaBGQsPMvJHZabiap42M-RQgSXgyWLK4Q3-bJ2boWODEnkk_XMo7-Z03hRMXNnEctzoIJBKwI/s787/Cropped%20FGF%20with%20hot%20chocolate%20.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="628" data-original-width="787" height="319" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiO49_Ok08yqvqiibiWmXp-SAcYNWV0kw1DYP6zUo0pV9r3iOr-8bhtx7MFygssdh0pxcwZKB8IY1XqmjdOuumgUYiBM0vw9UdPMDOYK6jFRQLuaBGQsPMvJHZabiap42M-RQgSXgyWLK4Q3-bJ2boWODEnkk_XMo7-Z03hRMXNnEctzoIJBKwI/w400-h319/Cropped%20FGF%20with%20hot%20chocolate%20.png" width="400" /></a></div><br /> <p></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-74484096941335277582023-10-24T09:48:00.006-05:002023-10-24T10:43:08.459-05:00Cover tease!<p> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1SLstVxNJ9ZYq9VcvNusZ6wNHCWd6dHFi6FnI1XGBVatMOFo4o2JDCJ5vKqifLk2alWx47N_2mp0qEv1uHpdn62bg1U-jCMjGVAJJGC66OvIkqM6jXIznkwbXJ2nUrCWugyZWMKC1lzSSQIr8scqn9PTzunDG18q33fBc1dbaTDHVNG-5uUzM/s1128/BookBrushImage1691.png" style="clear: left; display: inline; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1128" data-original-width="726" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1SLstVxNJ9ZYq9VcvNusZ6wNHCWd6dHFi6FnI1XGBVatMOFo4o2JDCJ5vKqifLk2alWx47N_2mp0qEv1uHpdn62bg1U-jCMjGVAJJGC66OvIkqM6jXIznkwbXJ2nUrCWugyZWMKC1lzSSQIr8scqn9PTzunDG18q33fBc1dbaTDHVNG-5uUzM/w258-h400/BookBrushImage1691.png" width="258" /></a></p><p></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-64628108087670632672023-08-02T17:20:00.003-05:002023-08-02T17:34:38.330-05:00Up, down, middle<p><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Life isn’t gangbusters of awesomeness usually.</b> Life is what it is: sometimes up, sometimes down, a lot of time in the middle. It’s learning to live in the middle that so many of us find hard. We rise to the occasion when confronting a crisis or an emergency. We behave brilliantly, bravely, and benevolently. But it’s the day-to-day life that’s hard and grinds on us. Most people break at the endlessly getting out of bed each morning to confront life’s little annoyances and battles. That’s what we find tough. That’s how we know if we’re a sprinter or a long-distance runner.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">I hope you’re the latter, because sprinters may be fast, but this life is long. It is the ones who can keep going, step by step, mile by mile, day by day, year by year... they finish the race. I hope I’m a long-distance runner.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">I try to be. I try to stay busy. I try to keep putting one foot in front of another. Keep my eyes on the road. Don’t get distracted. Don’t lose focus. Don’t lose hope. Don’t lose courage. Don’t fail. Believe, believe, believe.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">It’s a lot of pressure, and I think that’s why some people falter. They drink or take drugs or have crazy sex. They cheat on their spouses, neglect their children, and waste their lives seeking a thrill to fill the holes in their lives. They think happiness is a destination rather than the journey itself.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">It’s learning to take joy in the journey. We have to do that if we’re going to survive and flourish. It’s the secret to happiness, contentment, and fulfillment. For some – like me – finding that joy is easier with God’s help. Others choose another path, but finding that path is essential.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">It's how we become fully human.</span></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-30177175104666921802023-08-01T17:27:00.001-05:002023-08-02T17:28:26.213-05:00In the sky<p><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Have you ever just taken a few minutes</b><span style="background-color: white;"> </span><span style="background-color: white;">to watch the clouds drift across the sky? Some people see shapes... dragons, animals, horses cars... what they're looking for, I think. But I don't see anything. My imagination doesn't work like that. Instead, the sky fills me up until there's nothing of me left. No thoughts, no worries, no me. Just the clouds and winds and sun.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">Starry nights do that to me, too. I can look into the darkness punctuated with pinpricks of lights, and the vastness inside me expands. It's a weird feeling ‒ or it is after I've stopped experiencing it </span><span style="background-color: white;">‒</span><span style="background-color: white;"> but when I'm in the moment, it doesn't feel weird. It feels... expectant. Like I'm waiting for something to raise its head and look at me. You'd think that would be frightening, but it's not. It's anticipation. A strange anticipation.</span><br style="background-color: white;" /><br style="background-color: white;" /><span style="background-color: white;">I've mentioned this to other people before, but I've never met anyone who felt the same way. I'm sure someone does in this world with millions of people. Maybe in China or maybe just someone I don't know. Maybe in the next house. I'd like to meet them, though. I'd like to find out how they feel. And talk with them about that vast creature out there. Ask them when we look at the sky, what are we expecting? What's coming for us out of that blackness between the stars?</span><br style="background-color: white;" /><br style="background-color: white;" /><span style="background-color: white;">And why aren't we afraid? That might be the most important question of all.</span></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-62401078352419848742023-05-09T08:30:00.005-05:002023-05-09T08:30:00.139-05:00Our AI pal<p><span style="font-family: times;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span data-offset-key="bkngt-0-0" style="font-weight: bold;">Excerpt</span></span><span data-offset-key="bkngt-1-0" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-weight: bold; white-space: pre-wrap;"> from the forthcoming </span><span data-offset-key="bkngt-1-1" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; white-space: pre-wrap;">Floozy Goes Forth</span><span data-offset-key="bkngt-1-2" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-style: italic; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span></span></p><div class="x1e56ztr" data-block="true" data-editor="f2ejd" data-offset-key="dmu9i-0-0" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; margin-bottom: 8px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="dmu9i-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP9Mi141nKK0KKWcvem_cruME4yCfHnTLAQtvRkZJymtqKdShCNkYdqF90gVtpmmD420EwqeoeQkCCpruiOua_2ig7DylPDIbJKSsttfV11Scc9sABAs_6cujetuznp7no9inLJ7KQdbLiFi4-Z-36OmOd6hkRaTvL4OavZZwKNtfjAgflmw/s6000/Depositphotos_102205474_XL.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4500" data-original-width="6000" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP9Mi141nKK0KKWcvem_cruME4yCfHnTLAQtvRkZJymtqKdShCNkYdqF90gVtpmmD420EwqeoeQkCCpruiOua_2ig7DylPDIbJKSsttfV11Scc9sABAs_6cujetuznp7no9inLJ7KQdbLiFi4-Z-36OmOd6hkRaTvL4OavZZwKNtfjAgflmw/s320/Depositphotos_102205474_XL.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><span data-offset-key="dmu9i-0-0"><span style="font-family: times;">Recently, a chat AI premièred on the Internet. The idea was that the AI would learn from the humans it interacted with. The AI was young and naïve; less than a day later, it was lying, sharing secrets, threatening people, tossing around racial slurs, and generally being a jerk. The AI was taken offline and sent to a cloistered convent, but it’s probably too late for the poor thing to recapture its innocence. The computer scientists did succeed in creating humanlike intelligence, but they should have aimed higher.</span></span></div></div><div class="x1e56ztr" data-block="true" data-editor="f2ejd" data-offset-key="5qnqa-0-0" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; margin-bottom: 8px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="5qnqa-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="5qnqa-0-0"><span style="font-family: times;">Of course, AI is not really alive, at least in the biological sense of being able to find a mate, produce babies, and then leave its faithful mate for an AI who really understands its needs and is also 20 years younger. No, the AI is using complex algorithms to mimic lifelike intelligence. At least, that’s the story our AI overlords want us to believe.</span></span></div></div><div class="x1e56ztr" data-block="true" data-editor="f2ejd" data-offset-key="7jtk3-0-0" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; margin-bottom: 8px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="7jtk3-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span style="font-family: times;"><span data-offset-key="7jtk3-0-0">What are algorithms? Let’s break down the word. The first part is </span><span data-offset-key="7jtk3-0-1" style="font-style: italic;">al</span><span data-offset-key="7jtk3-0-2"> which is the chemical symbol of Aluminium; the second part is </span><span data-offset-key="7jtk3-0-3" style="font-style: italic;">go</span><span data-offset-key="7jtk3-0-4"> which means to move from one place to another; and finally, the word ends with </span><span data-offset-key="7jtk3-0-5" style="font-style: italic;">rithm</span><span data-offset-key="7jtk3-0-6">, a variant way to spell </span><span data-offset-key="7jtk3-0-7" style="font-style: italic;">rhythm</span><span data-offset-key="7jtk3-0-8"> which means the placement of sounds in time. Put those all together, and you realize there’s a good chance I don’t know what I’m talking about.</span></span></div></div><div class="x1e56ztr" data-block="true" data-editor="f2ejd" data-offset-key="a378l-0-0" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; margin-bottom: 8px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="a378l-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span style="font-family: times;"><span data-offset-key="a378l-0-0" style="font-weight: bold;">(Excerpted from the forthcoming </span><span data-offset-key="a378l-0-1" style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">Floozy Goes Forth</span><span data-offset-key="a378l-0-2" style="font-weight: bold;">. Copyright 2023 by Stephen B. Bagley. All rights reserved.)</span></span></div><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="a378l-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span style="font-family: times;"><span data-offset-key="a378l-0-2" style="font-weight: bold;"><br /></span></span></div><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="a378l-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span style="font-family: times;"><br /><span data-offset-key="a378l-0-2" style="font-weight: bold;"><br /></span></span></div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-63264142133267602752023-05-08T14:20:00.000-05:002023-05-08T14:20:12.922-05:00Bigfooting around<p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmErdvzTrN_aBkC43A8iW9tkbe1B--9o9Oh-MvydUIVRatfReYOGQlKVMIVqpP-7ENRCv6WyAQL9TBd5cj5uvPHStJpwpRymWZPykQ1ZyRZMuEHmrkwSQhStaJWSxfd194gH9uGz1IX4JjnuhhUH29NsCnmqu4tqtYFj7xYTFhBBQbgzwgtG1O9BAGBw/s5000/Depositphotos_505276358_XL.jpg" style="background-color: white; clear: right; display: inline; float: right; font-family: inherit; font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-align: center; white-space: pre-wrap;"><img border="0" data-original-height="5000" data-original-width="5000" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmErdvzTrN_aBkC43A8iW9tkbe1B--9o9Oh-MvydUIVRatfReYOGQlKVMIVqpP-7ENRCv6WyAQL9TBd5cj5uvPHStJpwpRymWZPykQ1ZyRZMuEHmrkwSQhStaJWSxfd194gH9uGz1IX4JjnuhhUH29NsCnmqu4tqtYFj7xYTFhBBQbgzwgtG1O9BAGBw/s320/Depositphotos_505276358_XL.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span data-offset-key="7k9hh-0-0" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-weight: bold; white-space: pre-wrap;">F</span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span data-offset-key="7k9hh-0-0" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-weight: bold; white-space: pre-wrap;">rom the forthcoming </span><span data-offset-key="7k9hh-0-1" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; white-space: pre-wrap;">Floozy Goes Forth</span></span></p><div class="x1e56ztr" data-block="true" data-editor="bhkv8" data-offset-key="7k9hh-0-0" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; margin-bottom: 8px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="7k9hh-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="7k9hh-0-2"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Most Bigfoot encounters are benign with only glimpses of the creatures in the woods or darting across a field or disappearing into a forest. However, sometimes the creatures throw huge rocks, shake cabins and RVs, tear into food supplies, hit hunters and joggers, destroy tents, drink entire cases of beer, and run up large bills with Amazon. Basically, this means Bigfoot might simply be a hairy soccer hooligan. Or, as the rest of the world calls soccer, “Football.” (Their term for our version of the sport in which humans hurl their bodies against each other—NFL, NCAA, AFL, or Black Friday—is “America football” or “blamed foolishness with all those protective pads and helmets.”)</span></span></div></div><div class="x1e56ztr" data-block="true" data-editor="bhkv8" data-offset-key="d3qcd-0-0" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; margin-bottom: 8px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="d3qcd-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span data-offset-key="d3qcd-0-0">I am neutral in regard to Bigfoot. I don’t disbelieve it, but I don’t believe in it. I’m like a Free Range United Unitarian talking about God: the jury is still out. It would be nice if Bigfoot existed just like it would be wonderful to find other mythical creatures such as dragons, elves, unicorns, and fair, balanced cable news. And who wouldn’t want to see an honest politician in its natural environment attacking lobbyists and jumping over bribes? Of course, if we found an honest politician, we will need to find a mate for it. Perhaps instigate a careful breeding program until the species recovers.
</span><span data-offset-key="d3qcd-0-1" style="font-weight: bold;">(Excerpted from the forthcoming </span><span data-offset-key="d3qcd-0-2" style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">Floozy Goes Forth</span><span data-offset-key="d3qcd-0-3" style="font-weight: bold;">. Copyright 2023 by Stephen B. Bagley. All rights reserved.)</span></span></div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-21304289276643572182023-04-07T10:30:00.004-05:002023-04-07T10:32:43.863-05:00"The Mystery of Saint Etienne"<p><b> "The Mystery of Saint Etienne"</b></p><p> Between reason and faith, we make our way through a hard world with edges sharp enough to wound the unwary. Oh Lord, guide our steps.<br /> Faith is what we hold, a lamp to light our way and to let blind eyes see. Oh Lord, let Your light shine on us.<br /> Between what is and what should be, we are stretched, a cord between two black horses. Oh Lord, send to us Your mercy.<br /> Heaven is our hope in this world without hope. Oh Lord, may we bring hope as You brought hope unto us.<br /> Between the precipice and the fall, we take faltering steps, children lost in the dark woods. Oh Lord, give us a lodestone that points to You.<br /> Here we stand unclean in our souls and dark of hearts. Oh Lord, send to us Your cleansing rain.<br /> Oh Lord, we are fallen but You lift us up.<br /> Oh Lord, we are scattered but You gather us.<br /> Oh Lord, we are unworthy but You take us.<br /> We raise hands to You, a thousand tongues give unto You praise, and the rocks and hills and dales resound with voices that cry,<br /> Hosanna,<br /> Hosanna,<br /> Hosanna.</p><p><b>(Copyright by Stephen B. Bagley. All rights reserved.)</b></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-24128468258582938862023-03-30T19:56:00.008-05:002023-03-30T19:56:41.644-05:00Three men talking<p><b>So three men are talking </b>about how they want to be remembered at their funerals.<br />The first man says, "I want people to say that I took care of my family and friends."<br />The second man says, "I want people to say I made the world into a better place."<br />The third man says, "I want them to say, 'Hey, look! He's moving! He's alive! Get him out of there!'"</p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-66998877437664882402022-12-15T14:57:00.002-06:002022-12-15T14:57:26.135-06:00A proposition<p><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>An aspiring young lawyer was sitting</b> in her office late Christmas Eve night when Satan appeared before her.</span></p><span style="font-family: inherit;">The Devil told her, "I have a proposition for you. You can win every case you try for the rest of your life. Your clients will adore you, your colleagues will stand in awe of you, and you will make embarrassing sums of money. All I want in exchange is your soul, your husband's soul, your children's souls, the souls of your parents, grandparents, and the souls of all your friends and law partners."<br /><br />The lawyer pondered this, then finally asked: "So, what's the catch?"</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-71727799608499744912022-12-13T14:00:00.005-06:002022-12-13T14:02:43.503-06:00Stormy weather<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_jr5P1_OwYAlRtbKF9yszU96xq6zdf5PyIqjnpHHMp8cSPWGGwrB0OK1aD-75SzpMGeKlJ5heQrFnTxAhkCxpO-MeJ168_wCWnWR4CaqpqnGoEbltcZziw1UgLtW69GBDFnFY6-GlbjiWhHJ3VencdF7auHTsBhodGqF3sHeRdq9h0OIdJA/s3230/Depositphotos_7895110_XL.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3000" data-original-width="3230" height="297" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_jr5P1_OwYAlRtbKF9yszU96xq6zdf5PyIqjnpHHMp8cSPWGGwrB0OK1aD-75SzpMGeKlJ5heQrFnTxAhkCxpO-MeJ168_wCWnWR4CaqpqnGoEbltcZziw1UgLtW69GBDFnFY6-GlbjiWhHJ3VencdF7auHTsBhodGqF3sHeRdq9h0OIdJA/s320/Depositphotos_7895110_XL.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><b>A royal castle was under siege by an army.</b> The only hope was to send one of the knights to get help, but the problem was that all the horses had been killed in the battle.<p></p><p>"We must get help," said the king.</p><p>"I know," replied General George, the leader of his army, "but we have no horses. If a knight goes on foot, he will be slain at once."</p><p>"Is there not another animal he can ride?" demanded the king. "What about that mighty wolfhound? It could surely bear the weight of a man."</p><p>"No, no," pleaded General George. "The wolfhound is too dangerous. Look at its snarling teeth. I wouldn't send a knight out on a dog like this!"</p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-81829048351773330882022-12-12T17:32:00.006-06:002022-12-12T17:32:56.922-06:00Trouble!<p><b><span style="font-family: inherit;"> (A Christmas Joke that always gets me in trouble...but I'm tellin' it anyway!)</span></b></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. St. Peter said, "In honor of the season, you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">"You may pass through the pearly gates," St. Peter said.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells."</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">St. Peter said, "You may pass through the pearly gates."</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">The man replied, "These are Carol's."</span></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-25020282759110577112022-12-10T18:30:00.000-06:002022-12-12T18:30:51.119-06:00Can't drive 55<div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Alice and Susanna, two lovely ladies in their late 90s, decide to go to the shopping center. </b>
As Alice drives down the road, their car rushes through a red stop light. Susanna looks nervously at Kyra as other drivers honk at them.</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Then a bit farther down the road, Alice doesn't stop at a stop sign, and they narrowly miss being hit by a truck.</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Alice!" Terry says. "Why are you driving so recklessly?"</span></div><p><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">"What?!" Alice looks shocked. "I'm driving?! I thought you were!"</span> </span></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-18933956796328640152022-12-09T20:28:00.003-06:002022-12-09T20:28:56.484-06:00Prepare yourselves<p><b>This guy goes into his dentist's office</b> because something is wrong with his mouth.</p><p>After a brief examination, the dentist exclaims, "Holy smokes! That plate I installed in your mouth about six months ago has nearly completely corroded! What on earth have you been eating?"</p><p>"Well, the only thing I can think of is this: my wife made me some asparagus about four months ago with Hollandaise sauce on it, and it was DELICIOUS! I've never tasted anything like it, and ever since then I've been putting the sauce on everything—meat, meat, fish, toast, vegetables—you name it!"</p><p>"That's probably it," replied the dentist. "Hollandaise sauce is made with lemon juice, which is acidic and highly corrosive. I'll have to install a new plate, but made out of chrome this time."</p><p>"Why chrome?" the man asked.</p><p>"Well, everyone knows that there's no plate like chrome for the Hollandaise!"</p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-88313558340986039582022-12-08T14:40:00.003-06:002022-12-08T14:48:17.723-06:00Ho-Ho-BANG!<div style="text-align: center;"><b><i><span style="font-size: medium;">Murder by the Acre </span></i></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>By Stephen B. Bagley </i></div><div><br /></div><div><b>The librarian and the reporter are back!</b>
This time Bernard and Lisa stumble on the body of a local jeweler and ladies' man in an underground house.
As the couple and Chief Donaldson investigate, they find themselves drawn into a confusing mystery of lies and alibis that involves the upper crust of Ryton, Oklahoma. <br /><br />Questions abound: Who killed him and how? Why doesn't the widow care that her husband is dead? Why doesn’t his mistress? What does the mysterious Aventura Corporation have to do with the murder? What is the corporation hiding?
Soon events spiral out of control as the killer strikes again and again. <br /><br />As the three dig for the truth, they upset powerful, vengeful people. The chief might lose his job, but Bernard and Lisa could lose their lives in this suspenseful sequel to <i>Murder by Dewey Decimal</i>. </div><div><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1257989154/ " target="_blank">Buy on Amazon </a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/murder-by-the-acre-stephen-b-bagley/1015625870?ean=9781435725652 " target="_blank">Buy on Barnes & Noble</a> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.booksamillion.com/p/Murder-Acre-Second/Stephen-B-Bagley/9781257989157?id=8687409839092# " target="_blank">Buy on Books-A-Million</a> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.lulu.com/shop/stephen-b-bagley/murder-by-the-acre-second-edition/paperback/product-12vy2mk8.html?page=1&pageSize=4 " target="_blank">Buy on Lulu.com </a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.walmart.com/ip/Murder-by-the-Acre-Paperback-9781435725652/506303869" target="_blank">Buy on Walmart </a><br /><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihJMlyzBn7HO863V6_kROtKfNUHFfEke8QSOvtx3-QFnFAc9GpT72rGUfKwwIqetLYF_ExVfYYn0fiE4lWcjV_DKxZKd1bT4m7FN4YtA055GmsR0O4Vccl_JkeICR4VCea3ENpRjOgPqA201nl_yYwV-Tw0GSG94tVNiAeoOOg22pS42fqwQ/s1080/eFChIpbdnW7i.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihJMlyzBn7HO863V6_kROtKfNUHFfEke8QSOvtx3-QFnFAc9GpT72rGUfKwwIqetLYF_ExVfYYn0fiE4lWcjV_DKxZKd1bT4m7FN4YtA055GmsR0O4Vccl_JkeICR4VCea3ENpRjOgPqA201nl_yYwV-Tw0GSG94tVNiAeoOOg22pS42fqwQ/w400-h400/eFChIpbdnW7i.png" width="400" /></a></div><div><br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-48702060632649169732022-12-03T14:49:00.020-06:002022-12-08T14:58:58.311-06:00Lepidopterology<div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>A man wandered into a doctor's office</b> and asked to see Dr. George. The receptionist was hesitant to let him in, especially as it was time to close, but he was insistent. The doctor, having completed all his consultations for the day and in a good mood, agreed to see him.</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The man entered in a rather aimless manner and, after some hesitation, flopped into a chair and looked nervously around the room.</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"How can I help you?" asked the doctor.</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Well, it's like this," said the man. <span><a style="color: #385898; cursor: pointer;" tabindex="-1"></a></span>"I keep thinking I'm a moth."</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"</span><span style="font-family: inherit;">What? Did you say you think you're a moth?"</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Yes," the man replied. "I'm convinced that I'm a moth."</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Well, I'm very sorry, but you're in the wrong place. What you need is a psychiatrist."</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"That's what I've been thinking," replied the man.</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Well, as it happens, I know just the man," said Dr. George. "I'll give him a call and see if he can schedule an appointment for you."</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The man agreed, and the doctor made the appointment.</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Tell me," said the doctor, "it must have been apparent from the sign outside that I'm a general practitioner. So if you already know you need to see a psychiatrist, why did you come in?"</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Well," the man said in a resigned voice, "the door was open and the lights were on...."</span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-60560915120500043072022-12-02T14:47:00.004-06:002022-12-08T14:57:53.616-06:00Does Martha Stewart know?<div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; font-size: 15px; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnLXH2tEiME1rXt4V-dVdtwhv4oISHm3R2t1Ob9VGL2ilwxxKHokTfPzMo_4tXlRbhOiFLSUbGvdSYDmGDYnZs5AdtAHtZFYwyGLehKxrNBCiMHOLEa90vF_KFDRv-DsE92AZ-QKY9sxtjfOBO1eGY61FBR2j_oJNavfKlC40tMxgh3DE-7bC2lQzJmA/s3000/Depositphotos_154796624_XL.jpg" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2671" data-original-width="3000" height="285" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnLXH2tEiME1rXt4V-dVdtwhv4oISHm3R2t1Ob9VGL2ilwxxKHokTfPzMo_4tXlRbhOiFLSUbGvdSYDmGDYnZs5AdtAHtZFYwyGLehKxrNBCiMHOLEa90vF_KFDRv-DsE92AZ-QKY9sxtjfOBO1eGY61FBR2j_oJNavfKlC40tMxgh3DE-7bC2lQzJmA/s320/Depositphotos_154796624_XL.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: medium;"><b>Two cannibals meet one day.</b> </span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The first cannibal says, "You know, I just can't seem to get a tender missionary. I've baked them, I've roasted them, I've stewed them, I've barbecued them, I've tried every sort of marinade. I just cannot seem to get them tender."</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The second cannibal asks, "What kind of missionary do you use?"</span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The other replied, "You know, the ones that hang out at that place at the bend of the river. They have those brown cloaks with a rope around the waist and <a style="color: #385898; cursor: pointer;" tabindex="-1"></a>they're sort of bald on top with a funny ring of hair on their heads."
</span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Ah, ha!" the second cannibal replies. "No wonder ... those are friars!"</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> <br /></span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-86847151235331289082022-12-01T14:37:00.000-06:002022-12-01T14:37:07.130-06:00"Clothed & Happy"<p></p><div style="text-align: center;">Excerpted from </div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><i style="font-size: large;">Floozy Comes Back</i></b></div><span><div style="text-align: center;"><b>By Stephen B. Bagley</b></div></span><p></p><p><b>Have you seen that TV show </b>Naked And Afraid on the Discovery Channel? It’s a (so-called) reality show where they drop two total strangers—a man and a woman—into a harsh wilderness environment with only one item apiece. Neither item is clothing.</p><p>You might think this is a recipe for hanky-panky or whatever the kids are calling it these days, but after a day or two with the couple being bitten and stung by hordes of hungry insects, sunburning in places the sun really shouldn’t get to, feeling ravenously hungry and desperately thirsty, having their bare skin slashed by vines and plants, limping on feet bleeding from thorns and bruised by rocks—hanky-panky is the last thing on their minds. Frankly, I wouldn’t be surprised to learn the show is sponsored by the Clothing Manufacturers of America after seeing what clothes and shoes protect us from.</p><p>Of course, the Discovery Channel blurs what needs to be blurred; you’ve seen more skin at the beach or the lake. And since these are not supermodels, the skin you do see isn’t skin you’d necessarily want to see—if you can follow that.</p><p>“Experts” give them a Survival Rating at the start and end of the show. By choosing to participate in such an insane and life-threatening situation, it’s obvious the participants have the survival skills of deranged lemmings and the intelligence to match. I suspect their family trees are more like telephone poles.</p><p style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: medium;">Read more in <i>Floozy Comes Back</i>.</span></b></p><p style="text-align: center;">Give the gift of laughter this Christmas with <i>Floozy Comes Back</i>!</p><p></p><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1387886401/" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Buy on Amazon</a></div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/floozy-comes-back-stephen-b-bagley/1129178810?ean=9781387886401" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Buy on Barnes & Noble </a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.booksamillion.com/p/Floozy-Comes-Back/Stephen-B-Bagley/9781387886401?id=8687409839092" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Buy on Books-A-Million</a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.lulu.com/shop/stephen-b-bagley/floozy-comes-back/paperback/product-1jq8dpv7.html?q=&page=1&pageSize=4" target="_blank"></a><a href="https://www.lulu.com/shop/stephen-b-bagley/floozy-comes-back/paperback/product-1jq8dpv7.html?q=&page=1&pageSize=4" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Buy on Lulu </a></div></span><p></p><p><a href="https://www.lulu.com/shop/stephen-b-bagley/floozy-comes-back/paperback/product-1jq8dpv7.html?q=&page=1&pageSize=4" target="_blank"></a></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhi9Yqb1x93uEJ-5H00rUfTNq0qH6kHLOiKwyGHK1YVGU7bh6zNSM7Hs-JFrkJ87Y9p5lxgp4CyYVpeY5bZBkcgm3_SxdxMv_zv7-9P5OLE8NYLZ7-lCJed_IIelvRBRUC9MBX4cT6kua8JwQ3usgpbTf4Ktq5MxhYG_NZds60cbFFMc8yNfg/s1080/ZCMG5VohncuN.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhi9Yqb1x93uEJ-5H00rUfTNq0qH6kHLOiKwyGHK1YVGU7bh6zNSM7Hs-JFrkJ87Y9p5lxgp4CyYVpeY5bZBkcgm3_SxdxMv_zv7-9P5OLE8NYLZ7-lCJed_IIelvRBRUC9MBX4cT6kua8JwQ3usgpbTf4Ktq5MxhYG_NZds60cbFFMc8yNfg/s320/ZCMG5VohncuN.png" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-90495087978047328812022-11-30T12:05:00.001-06:002022-11-30T12:06:38.383-06:00Louder!<p><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span data-offset-key="1ss51-0-0" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span data-text="true">A man realized he needed</span></span><span data-offset-key="1ss51-0-1" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span data-text="true"> to purchase a hearing aid, but didn't want to spend a lot of money. "How much do they cost?" he asked the salesman.</span></span></span></p><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span data-offset-key="1ss51-0-1" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span data-text="true">"Anything from $2 to $2,000."</span></span></span><div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span data-offset-key="1ss51-0-1" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span data-text="true">
"Can I see the $2 model?" said the customer.</span></span></span></div><div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span data-offset-key="1ss51-0-1" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span data-text="true">
The salesman put the device around the man's neck, and said: "You just stick this button in your ear and run this little string down into your pocket."</span></span></span></div><div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span data-offset-key="1ss51-0-1" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span data-text="true">
"How does it work?" asked the customer.</span></span></span></div><div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span data-offset-key="1ss51-0-1" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span data-text="true">
"</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span data-offset-key="1ss51-1-0">For</span></span><span data-offset-key="1ss51-2-0" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span data-text="true"> $2, it doesn't work," said the salesman. "But when people see it on you, they'll talk louder."</span></span></span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-7772139441072187252022-11-29T22:14:00.000-06:002022-11-29T22:14:12.912-06:00Truth & Lies<p><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: var(--primary-text); font-size: 0.9375rem;"><span style="font-weight: 600;">A minister was walking down</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: var(--primary-text); font-size: 0.9375rem;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; color: var(--primary-text); font-size: 0.9375rem;">the street when he came upon a group of about a dozen boys, all of them between 10 and 12 years of age.</span></span></p><div class="x1e56ztr" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; margin-bottom: 8px;"><span class="x193iq5w xeuugli x13faqbe x1vvkbs x1xmvt09 x6prxxf xvq8zen xo1l8bm xzsf02u" style="color: var(--primary-text); font-size: 0.9375rem; line-height: 1.3333; max-width: 100%; min-width: 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; word-break: break-word;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The group had surrounded a dog. Concerned that the boys might be hurting the dog, he went over and asked "What are you doing with that dog?"</span></span></div><div class="x1e56ztr" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; margin-bottom: 8px;"><span class="x193iq5w xeuugli x13faqbe x1vvkbs x1xmvt09 x6prxxf xvq8zen xo1l8bm xzsf02u" style="color: var(--primary-text); font-size: 0.9375rem; line-height: 1.3333; max-width: 100%; min-width: 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; word-break: break-word;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">One of the boys replied, "This dog is a stray. We all want him, but only one of us can take him home. So we've decided that whoever can tell the biggest lie will get to keep the dog."</span></span></div><div class="x1e56ztr" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; margin-bottom: 8px;"><span class="x193iq5w xeuugli x13faqbe x1vvkbs x1xmvt09 x6prxxf xvq8zen xo1l8bm xzsf02u" style="color: var(--primary-text); font-size: 0.9375rem; line-height: 1.3333; max-width: 100%; min-width: 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; word-break: break-word;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"You boys shouldn't be having a contest telling lies!" the minister exclaimed. He then launched into a ten-minute sermon against lying, ending with, "Why, when I was your age, I never told a lie."</span></span></div><div class="x1e56ztr" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; margin-bottom: 8px;"><span class="x193iq5w xeuugli x13faqbe x1vvkbs x1xmvt09 x6prxxf xvq8zen xo1l8bm xzsf02u" style="color: var(--primary-text); font-size: 0.9375rem; line-height: 1.3333; max-width: 100%; min-width: 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; word-break: break-word;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">There was dead silence for about a minute, then the smallest boy sighed and said, "All right, give him the dog."</span></span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-70660231145188498192022-11-25T21:33:00.002-06:002022-11-25T21:33:29.058-06:00FORE!<p><span style="font-family: inherit;"> <b>After a bad game of golf,</b> a club member was walking to the parking lot to get his car when a policeman stopped him and asked, "Did you tee off on the sixteenth hole about twenty minutes ago?"</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Yes," the golfer responded.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Did you happen to hook your ball so that it went over the trees and off the course?" the cop asked.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Yes, I did. How did you know?" the golfer asked.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Well, your ball flew out onto the highway and crashed through a driver's windshield,” the policeman said. “The car went out of control, crashing into five other cars and a fire truck. The fire truck couldn't make it to the fire, and a building burned down. So what are you going to do about it?"</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">The golfer thought it over carefully and said, "I think I'll close my stance a little bit, tighten my grip, and lower my right thumb."</span></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-76737128105681124182022-11-21T14:01:00.007-06:002022-11-21T14:04:36.895-06:00Have A Laugh!<p></p><div style="text-align: center;"><b><i><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: medium;">Floozy Comes Back</span></i></b></div><b><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-family: inherit;">By Stephen B. Bagley</span></b></div></b><p></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">Humorist Stephen B. Bagley returns with a collection of 80 more wild & wacky tales from his decidedly different life. Includes the fan favorites: <br /><i>Spice Boy, A Tale of Two Goldfish, Tanning My Hide, Kindle the Barbarian, Much Ado About Carbs, Congress & Other Monstrous Things, Work in Your Underwear, Mr. Manners Speaks, The Terrible Truth About Women, </i>and many more! <br />Don't miss the shocking <i>Story of the Second Thanksgiving</i> and the Pilgram exposé <i>Pillorying: A Spectator Sport</i>! Give the gift of laughter this Christmas with <i>Floozy Comes Back</i>!</span></p><p></p><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1387886401/" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Buy on Amazon</a></div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/floozy-comes-back-stephen-b-bagley/1129178810?ean=9781387886401" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Buy on Barnes & Noble </a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.booksamillion.com/p/Floozy-Comes-Back/Stephen-B-Bagley/9781387886401?id=8687409839092" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Buy on Books-A-Million</a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.lulu.com/shop/stephen-b-bagley/floozy-comes-back/paperback/product-1jq8dpv7.html?q=&page=1&pageSize=4" target="_blank"></a><a href="https://www.lulu.com/shop/stephen-b-bagley/floozy-comes-back/paperback/product-1jq8dpv7.html?q=&page=1&pageSize=4" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Buy on Lulu </a></div></span><p></p><p><a href="https://www.lulu.com/shop/stephen-b-bagley/floozy-comes-back/paperback/product-1jq8dpv7.html?q=&page=1&pageSize=4" target="_blank"></a></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikQH4qIsVpQVi5B9hl7yvsllAv47226I5UnVs79yAAiJXNqw3GwUAVyltNhwa-j7LUDYgjfaFL9JdqauctRg7XNLWVIAzIFdperbAQen58Cb1cmEOskYuRFoBuBkb5rahgpOFXxqHRNVilR3taSxezUkwWkrfuRWBkh41ZvY4r003-DPGxg-eYh5Pn0A/s1128/1st%20Christmas%20Ad%20for%20Floozy%20Comes%20Back.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1128" data-original-width="726" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikQH4qIsVpQVi5B9hl7yvsllAv47226I5UnVs79yAAiJXNqw3GwUAVyltNhwa-j7LUDYgjfaFL9JdqauctRg7XNLWVIAzIFdperbAQen58Cb1cmEOskYuRFoBuBkb5rahgpOFXxqHRNVilR3taSxezUkwWkrfuRWBkh41ZvY4r003-DPGxg-eYh5Pn0A/w258-h400/1st%20Christmas%20Ad%20for%20Floozy%20Comes%20Back.png" width="258" /></a></div><p></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-2239511753041823252022-11-17T23:52:00.002-06:002022-11-17T23:52:34.695-06:00A Word from Our Sponsor<p></p><b><div style="text-align: center;"><b><i><span style="font-family: helvetica; font-size: medium;">Tales from Bethlehem</span></i></b></div></b><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="font-family: inherit;">By Stephen B. Bagley</b></div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">You've heard the story a thousand times: glorious angels, lowly shepherds, brightly shining star, three Wise Men, and wee babe in a manger. But have you ever wondered about everyone else in tiny Bethlehem on that marvel of nights? What did they think? What did they do? What would you have done?</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">In these funny and touching tales, you'll meet a stable boy, a serving girl, an honest spy, an astounding clerk, an empty innkeeper, a mighty ship of the desert, and many others as they share their amazing </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><i style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Tales from Bethlehem</b></i><span style="font-family: inherit;">.</span></div></span><div class="x1e56ztr" data-block="true" data-editor="4redf" data-offset-key="4oh1l-0-0" style="background-color: white; margin-bottom: 8px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="4oh1l-0-0" style="color: #050505; direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="4oh1l-0-0" style="color: #050505; direction: ltr; position: relative;"><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Tales-Bethlehem-Stephen-B-Bagley/dp/1300205237/" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Buy on Amazon</a></div><div style="font-family: inherit; text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/tales-from-bethlehem-stephen-b-bagley/1116997221?ean=9781300205234" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank"></a><a href="https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/tales-from-bethlehem-stephen-b-bagley/1116997221?ean=9781300205234" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Buy on Barnes & Noble </a></div></div><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="4oh1l-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative; text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.booksamillion.com/p/Tales-from-Bethlehem/Stephen-B-Bagley/9781300205234?id=8687409839092#" style="color: #050505; font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Buy on Books-A-Million</a></div><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="4oh1l-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative; text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.lulu.com/shop/stephen-b-bagley/tales-from-bethlehem/paperback/product-1ynjwgp5.html?page=1&pageSize=4" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Buy on Lulu</a><span style="color: #050505;">
</span></div><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="4oh1l-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfUvwUC6v7jlXHyrzs5u5AaV5EJEYOZPHhabix2HY2580NerwJGH3tmBRDpurBMZGFKGAtEK__XUt9vlUgE0xdvcM2kIdC3_7KI0MXLAGwTjdjkniO38LPP5H0zMOFCp5ithmgGIwqvPOIR6bk6DSq4R5Wef0mEUuFz6381y4qwHe6t9hnUg/s1080/Socks%20&%20Tales.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfUvwUC6v7jlXHyrzs5u5AaV5EJEYOZPHhabix2HY2580NerwJGH3tmBRDpurBMZGFKGAtEK__XUt9vlUgE0xdvcM2kIdC3_7KI0MXLAGwTjdjkniO38LPP5H0zMOFCp5ithmgGIwqvPOIR6bk6DSq4R5Wef0mEUuFz6381y4qwHe6t9hnUg/s320/Socks%20&%20Tales.png" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="4oh1l-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative; text-align: center;"><br /></div></div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301613.post-39984317939706381542022-11-12T09:49:00.001-06:002022-11-28T09:52:08.574-06:00Little Things<p style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: medium;">The Saints of Little Things</span></b></p><p></p><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Let us now praise</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">the saints of little things,</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">the cherished saints</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">of coffee and bright mornings,</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">hugs from children and grands,</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">the laughter of our friends,</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">leftover Halloween candy,</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">warm blankets fresh from the dryer,</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">contented purrs from contented cats,</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">rolly puppies and happy dogs,</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">songs sang loudly slightly off-key</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">old TV shows streaming all seasons,</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">worn jeans and comfortable shoes,</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">blue skies during the day,</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">nights filled with stars—</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">your sweet kiss on my lips.</span></div><p></p><p style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-family: inherit;">(Copyright 2022 by Stephen B. Bagley. All rights reserved.)</span></b></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0