Monday, July 07, 2008

Poorly laid plans

      I'm officially behind in everything. EVERYTHING! Housework piled up, clothes everywhere, dust thick enough to grow plants in, carpet needs vacuuming, filing months behind, Murder by the Acre stalled and in trouble, Murder by Dewey Decimal hardcover formatting not finished, July family newsletter due, bills to be paid, EndlesS store still not done, EndlesS hardcover a distant dream, blood sugar is a rollercoaster, need to lose 100 pounds, everything is a mess, mess, mess. I do understand why people disappear into World of Warcraft. Except ... I have two characters dead in WoW and haven't taken the time to get them alive again. I'm even behind in my playing.
      I feel immense pressure. I feel like I'm spinning my wheels. And behind all of this, I have the sinking feeling that I'm not productive enough and/or not bright enough and/or not dedicated enough and/or not ... just basically not. I might be lazy.
      I also whine too much.
      So there I am. Don't ask me about MBTA. Even though I know you don't mean it that way, every question feels like pressure, and I don't have any answers. Don't ask about MBDD hardcover or EndlesS hardcover. Once again, pressure and no answers. But I will tell you this: MBTA will come out this summer. MBDD hardcover will be approved for retail distribution, and the EndlesS hardcover will be on Lulu.com. I'm not going to surrender my goals just because I've become mired in a personal swamp. I will make it out of this. We will have cause to celebrate. I'm not beaten. I won't be.
      Anyway, that's my world lately. I hope your world is treating you well. If not, well, hang in there. We'll work it out eventually. One way or another. We're a match for anything.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

The only person holding a gun to your head over MBDD, MBTA, and EndlesS is you. Goals are not deadlines. There's no rule written somewhere that you can't adjust a bit.

No beating yourself up. I know just how you feel, but there are only so many hours in a day. (Though my son swears that Asians have figured out a way to get extra time out of a day--that's why they're so good at academics and still continue to churn out great electronics, games, and anime. Go figure.)

You'll figure it out. You're bright enough to figure out a system. :)

Anonymous said...

I only ask because I'm so eager to read MBTA I might burst! :)

It sounds like you're under the gun. Take a deep breath and tell yourself, "This too shall pass."

We're cheering you on!

Kirsten said...

One thing at a time, dude, one thing at a time. Multitasking is overrated. Pick one, finish it, then pick another and repeat. You'll feel better for having accomplished something.

Well, that's how it works for me, anyway. Digging out is a pain, especially when the mess is of my own making. ;-)

Trixie said...

What are they going to do, fire you? Nah. Lighten up a little and enjoy the journey.

(Hello, Pot? Meet Kettle.)

Jean said...

Pay the bills that are due/overdue, and then take care of the rest a little at a time. You'll get there.

AK Huckeby said...

Dude, how do you eat an elephant?


You have to knock it in the head dead and then cook it. I mean, if you took a single bite without the prior, that elephant would kick your butt all over the place and probably stomp you into the ground...not to mention all his/her elephant friends would be gunning for you and you wouldn't have a chance. And, then, if you DID kill it, but didn't cook it you'd be eating raw elephant and probably get some kind of sickness that landed you in the bathroom for days on end - YUCK!


My point is that you don't want either of those things...so just kill the elephant man! And it's ok to leave a few elephants running around. You'll be satisfied for awhile with your elephant, but sooner or later it'll run out and you don't want a bunch of dead rancid elephants laying around waiting for you...set them free - if they come back to you they are yours, if not, it was never meant to be. Or was that birds? I don't know. What were we talking about?

SBB said...

FF, your son might have something there!

Breathing, Gloria, I'm breathing. Deeply. :)

Good advice, Kirsten, and I'm attempting to use it.

Trying to enjoy the journey, Trixie, trying.

Paid my bills today, Jean.

Adam ... Adam ... I don't want to eat an elephant and you need to stop telling people that I do. It's quite rude.

I appreciate all the support I've received from all of you. It's what keeps me going. Thank you all.

Jean said...

Yay, Tech. Well done. One more babystep, and you're on the way.

Ummmm...regarding the elephants, open the front door and shoo them outside. They are just something you don't need to deal with right now.