Wednesday, November 03, 2004

Regret tonight

      You don't read this blog. Or maybe you do.
      I wouldn't expect you to. You've gone on to a new love. Or maybe not.
      You see, I don't know. We haven't spoken in a long time. But tonight I was listening to the radio, and a song played that made me think of you. I know it's a cliche, and we both hate cliches. It wasn't even a song that I can remember us listening to, but it reminded me of when we were together.
      Somehow, maybe because of all this time in between, I can mostly remember only the good. The bad ending doesn't seem so bad now. Funny, huh?
      For a moment, I indulged myself. I thought of what I should have said, what I should have done, how I could have made things work out differently. I like to think that if I had known how much I would miss you, miss your wit, your smile, your wisdom, that if I had known, I would have been smarter. I would have made the right decisions that would have kept us together, would have kept our love growing despite all the things against it.
      I know better, of course.
      I know that nothing is served by this look at the past.
      We made mistakes. We paid for them. It's different now. We're different now. And we can't go back.
      But I wanted to say -- even though you'll never read this or if you do, I won't ever know -- that you're remembered with love. That I regret losing you. But I won't ever regret knowing you.
      The song ended. I have work to do.

All alone I came into this world
All alone I will someday die
Solid stone is just sand and water, baby,
Sand and water, and a million years gone by.

I will see you in the light of a thousand suns
I will hear you in the sound of the waves
I will know you when I come, as we all will come
Through the doors beyond the grave.

All alone I came into the world
All alone I will someday die
Solid stone is just sand and water, baby,
Sand and water, and a million years gone by.


By Beth Nielsen Chapman and Bill Lloyd
from the CD sand and water

7 comments:

Erudite Redneck said...

Poignant. Touching. Real.

Powersleeper said...

Sometimes we have to look at the past, no matter how hard it hurts. Don't dwell on it to long, we all need to move on. Keep the faith dude, the sun will come up tomorrow and you have many people who care for you.

Unknown said...

And this, too, shall pass...like gas ;-)

Anonymous said...

I found that song on my online music service. It's beautiful! I downloaded it. Is the rest of her music as good as that song? And baby if the girl you're talking of has any heart at all she regrets losing you! :)
-Susan1

Gloria Williams said...

I've felt like this before. Life gives us regrets so that we can grow wiser. At least, I hope it works like that! :)

Anonymous said...

test testff

Jacinda said...

*sniffle* Makes me wish I was the one who's missed :) :)